Wow, laying the salt on really thick. Either A) you're normally like that and just a shitty person. Or B) you're lying, and you do care enough that you're at someone you met over text on a meme website.
You trigger us into laughter because you're that cute chihuahua. The notion that you seek emotional fulfillment in triggering others, denotes sincere insecurity issues. I'd suggest a therapist, but we went down that road already.