And everything and everyone else that is not Muslim.

Muslims hate everyone who's not a Muslim, yes. But shush! 🤫 Don't say it too loud or you'll ruin it. It's all part of the Master Plan to install the Caliphate in the White House, inshallah. 👀😈 Allahu Akbar.

PS You should go and spend some time in a Muslim country and/or try to make some Muslim friends. You might change your mind about a few things – who knows? (Careful, though: If you make them mad they might chop your hand off with a scimitar. That's just how they roll. (So do the heads of infidels... 💀😵))

I’ll pass.
And thanks for proving my assertion.

It's all good though. Like, sure, it takes a while to get used to. Luckily I only lost my left hand when I first started hanging out with my Muslim homies and accidently offended them. ☠️ But I'm right-handed so it's fine. Plus these days we have awesome prosthetic limbs as well as voice recognition software so it doesn't stop me typing. 🦾

Sarcasm aside, though, it's a lot of people out there in *a lot* of very different countries and cultures. They're not all bad. 🙏 It's like someone saying all Americans are Bible-thumping redneck hillbillies who never left the village and only marry their cousins or something. 🤠

So remember: if you're thinking this about "them", rest assured plenty of "them" are also thinking stuff about you that you know not to be accurate, because it's just what they've heard. Until they meet you and you can show you're not how they imagine.

(Some people overseas also have ideas like that btw and think all Westerners are on a secret Christian military crusade to destroy their cultures. We need to all sit down and talk with real people and find we may not be as different as we think at the end of the day. ✌️)

That’s got to be rough on you… considering the code of Islamic hygienical jurisprudence called Qaḍāʾ al-Ḥāǧa. Look it up.

Actually not as "rough" as you might think. 🤭(That's toilet paper, amigo/amiga. Unless you get the fancy 3-ply stuff.) I can still use a shattaf (aka bum gun lol, or douche spray or bidet) to get nice and clean. Much better than scratching your backside with paper like we do in most of the West. Japanese toilets have something similar but much more futuristic, and they're not exactly an Islamic country. 🚀

Imagine "washing" your hands after taking a dump with just dry paper instead of water and soap lol. Islamic way is much cleaner. Plus it saves trees and is loads of fun. 🥳 (And not a problem when everyone rushes to buy toilet paper during shortages.)

(Not that most guys even bother washing their hands properly in the bar's restroom anyway but that's a different matter lol.)

Catch: now I'm even more of a "douche" haha.

Also might be bending the rules a bit using my right hand to hold the nozzle, but hopefully I'll be forgiven under the circumstances. 🤔🙏

Not a believer anyway so not sure it even applies.

😂

I was referring to the lack of your left hand.
Not tp or douches.

Douché lol.

Tbf I was also referring to that. You're supposed to use your left hand to relieve yourself. I haven't consulted the muftis about what you do if you're an amputee and only have a right hand.

Maybe it's a gray (water) area...

Not that I care either way cos I'm an infidel anyway so I don't gaf lol. But still, gotta have principles and all that.

Btw, you get points for the academic transliteration. 👏 Most people mess it up, hence why you can find a million variant spellings of words when Romanized from languages with such different scripts like Arabic, Hebrew and Russian, and why names like Muhammad or Gaddafi have so many different versions. Props for including the underdots. (They're a pain to get on the keyboard.) Completely different sound without them though.

Way back in the day my grandfather who worked in oil was offered a job in Saudi Arabia. He shot down the job. One he didn't want to uproot his family like that. He also had 9 daughters(including my mother) and 2 sons. This was a time long, long, LONG before the internet and radio and TV were barely a thing so yet even he knew. Also raising his daughters to have a bit of a FAFO mentality toward people who tried to push them around. In other words instant international incident the second some Muslim tried something against my mom or aunts.

So awful of them when it comes to being disrespected or with people getting out of line like that in their country.

Thank the Gods they didn't have lynchings in them countries.

😅
It's not so much that Muslims "hate dogs", by the way. On the contrary, actually: kindness and compassion towards animals is an important part of the faith. (What people actually do in different places is a different story, of course, and animal cruelty sadly exists in many places, but that arguably applies equally to Christianity and Christians, or secular people, for that matter.)

One reason you see less dogs as pets in Muslim societies is that in *some* Islamic traditions, dogs are considered ritually impure, so they're not kept as pets by some for that reason. (There are others.) It's not the dog that's bad in itself; it's touching it that's more the practical and hygiene issue when you want to pray.

Plenty of Muslims do keep dogs as pets, of course. Cultural practices (as well as interpretations of sacred texts and Islamic rules, especially interpretations of the Hadiths) vary considerably across countries and cultures when you've got 1 billion people and 1400 years of history.

PS Plenty of Western atheists and others hate dogs also. There are whole online forums dedicated to it lol. 😉 Important not to generalize. 🙏 It has nothing to do with rejecting "Western values". That's a totally separate topic. You can discuss that, but the dog thing is not a great example of it IMHO. 🙃

It's not like you need to own a pooch to prove your loyalty to the West. (Or if it is, I missed that class at school because I've never heard that.)

In my opinion, chickens make better pets

Chickens?

Yes, they're very tasty.
When you're bored of free and organic free-range eggs you can just have them for Thanksgiving and get a new one. 🍗
Great pets.
Plus, they don't poop and wee everywhere or wake up your neighbours at 5 am. (That's roosters. Stick to the female ones. The male ones don't even make eggs so they're not such good value.)

The males are the alarm clocks

🤣

So basically you need 2 chickens to do the work of a single dog lol. But that's still usually cheaper than buying one dog. Plus, dogs don't lay eggs.

They just lay poop, which isn't as nutritious or tasty, unless you're a dog because they like to eat it. (Also, it often contains parasites that can make you go blind.)

So get a platypus if you want that. But watch out when collecting their eggs for your breakfast because those critters are also venomous. ⚠️ Or, even better, an alligator. Much better than a puny guard dog. 🐊 Thieves will think twice before messing with you then. 💪

Or a kangaroo cos they make up for their lack of egg-laying by being buff af and will beat the crap out of any wannabe chancer. Heck, just save time and move to Australia, where basically everything that moves (or grows) is trying to kill you.)

“…Australia, where basically everything that moves (or grows) is trying to kill you.)”
I’ve heard that.
We have a saying in Texas… if it crawls, it will bite you and if it flies, it will sting you.

Yeah. And if it has leaves, it will poison you lol. 🌵 Or at least give you a fun trip you won't forget to another dimension. 🍄👽 🌌 They have all the fun. Europe is so tame in comparison. 😅

But everything on the other side of the Pacific is seemingly more expensive except for housing

I bet a platypus or kangaroo is cheaper Down Under than in the US though. Especially now with all those tariffs. (Have you seen the price of platypus eggs at CostCo recently?! 🤯 Trump sure has a lot to answer for.)

You can buy platypus eggs?

I mean, you *could*. Before Trump put his silly tariffs up. 🙄 Gonna decimate the Australian platypus egg industry, I can tell you. That was one of their key exports. Wait for the protests. 🤬 No more kangaroo double cheeseburgers at McDonald's either.

(Actually, no. Think they're a protected species and not even sure they're edible. Plus they're tiny so you'll need a lot to make a decent omelette. Stick to alligator tortillas is my advice. Much easier to breed. Just don't let them get too big or you might be what's on the menu... )

Are you australian, by any chance?

Nah, mate. But I am an English native speaker. Never even been to Straya. I just have a similarly sarcastic SOH that USAians often don't get (as I'm constantly reminded of here lol). Like, I write stuff that to me (and most other people where I'm from) is so *obviously* a pisstake as to almost be boring cos it's stating the obvious, and people here still somehow take it literally and get offended lol. I guess humour really doesn't cross the Pond. 😅 Wow. Aussies usually get it. Do I have to add an /s tag to every message lol?

They also take care of your lawn well by keeping it mowed, killing all the weeds and earwigs, and fertilizing it.

Like I said, great pets. Glad we're on the same page lol. (Obviously we are cos we're commenting on the same thread, but I mean in a general sense too.)

👀😶‍🌫️🤭

Do you ever wonder if you fall for religious propaganda?

Because this whole "Muslims hate dogs" thing is religious propaganda. Specifically, anti-muslim propaganda. Unless,you actively hate a specific religion and are deliberately spreading lies about them?

Which do you think it is? You fell for some propaganda or you're spreading lies?

Neither, they hate dogs

ok but isn't this just Islamophobia and not politics

Truth is truth.

you're not speaking facts
you're just being f**king racist

I didn’t speak anything. Just saying dogs are unclean in Islam it’s in there Hadiths.

Islam is a political system, and dogs are considered dirty in that political system ...
Ipso facto...

I mean dogs are dirty everywhere lol. You don't have to be Muslim to see that. They slobber and wee on everything, poop everywhere without burying it like cats, leave fluff all over the place, traipse filth into buildings, and some of the randier males hump everything that moves (or doesn't lol). Plenty of people are allergic or afraid of them. Plus, they endanger and kill wildlife and livestock as well as even humans. They are bred from wolves, after all. Apex predators.

Sure, they can be cute af and if they're service, farm, police or military dogs, etc, can be life-saving and loyal to a fault. No other animal bar maybe horses and cows is that useful. Humans literally wouldn't even have civilization without them.

But I wouldn't want one in the operating theatre when I'm having my triple heart bypass unless it's been thoroughly sterilized (as in washed) and scrubbed up. 🤣

it's unclean, but not entirely haram.

So it’s not racist its a fact.

as previously said by flipmymeme, discouraged isn't the same thing as forbidden.

So what. Many believe it is indeed Haram and some moslem scholars have written as such. Some say no, but that doesn’t change that in general Muslims dislike dogs.

muhammad ali literally had a dog 🙏

So what, some exceptions don’t nullify what their teachings espouse. Some Muslims have dogs. Their teachings say you shouldn’t unless they are shepherd or guard dogs.

Not so much about whether it's racist (Islam isn't a race anyway – there are Muslims of all races) but more that it's not entirely an accurate statement. As posted above by our Canary friend, ritually unclean according to a lot of traditions, but not haram (forbidden), like pork.

"Some Muslims hate dogs." Yes.
"Some atheists and Christians and Satanists also hate dogs." Yes.
"Muslims hate dogs." Bit of a generalization.

Some Muslims interpret the Koran to say dogs are only permitted as guard or shepherd. Many are taught it is a filthy animal to be avoided.

Yeah I mean my understanding is it depends on the interpretation of the Qur'an, Hadiths (which very a lot in their degree of authenticity/how reliable or authoritative they are considered to be) and other legal commentaries over the ages. There are different schools of thought. But I can't speak for Muslims ofc. Everyone is different.

Anyway I'm not a Muslim and I don't like dogs. I prefer cats. Or chickens lol. Am I gonna get into trouble at US customs or do I have to wear an "I ❤️ 🐕" T-shirt to be allowed in? 🤔🤭🙀🤣

Well I have no idea if you will be let in, that has nothing to do with whether Muslims like or hate or tolerate dogs.

Fair enough. Anyway wish me luck at the airport lol. 🤞