So we can't talk about the past because of how it makes certain people feel? If it happened, it happened. If it didn't, it didn't.
You want to change the narrative around the bad shit? Find new heroes.
When the crimes of our past come up, acknowledge them. If you can't acknowledge that black people were mistreated without seeing it as an attack on white people, then point to the fact that there were white people in the fight for justice. Hell, why does the Republican party (who apparently thinks the parties never switched) get butt hurt over it? Pretty much the entire early Republican party were heroes of this story. Cassius Clay (abolitionist, not the boxer) is one of my favorites. The fact of the matter is as a nation we allowed slavery despite 'all men are created equal', we had segregation, etc. So did other countries. This isn't about us being worse than others, its about owning our past, good and bad.
Now if lies are being taught...that needs to be corrected for sure. Facts are facts.
Letting schools teach you the 'we are always on the side of angels" version of history is bad. Why would you question your government if the past was so pristine?
White guilt - What you are describing is realizing you are proud of a whitewashed America that never existed. So again...refocus. Admit the wrong, and be even prouder of the people who did right. Because there are people who loved this country enough to die to make it better. When just how evil slavery was gets glossed over, you do disservice to those who fought and died to stop it. When you try to ignore the Tulsa Race Massacre (among others) you ignore some of the tragedies some of our fellow Americans have had to endure. You can't really be proud of how far we've come if you don't know where we started.
You can have American pride - but America includes all races. So if you want to remember your roots (German, Irish, Spanish, Greek, etc.) and take pride in that, awesome. But taking pride in being white is not that. White pride is taking pride in what you aren't.
A minority doing something to honor their differences (from the majority) and to try and take pride in that instead of feeling like an outsider or other has a different energy than the majority taking pride in what makes them different from minorities. I'm sorry, but it just does.