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The Power Of The Arcane Is Not Meant For Thieves

The Power Of The Arcane Is Not Meant For Thieves | Thou greedy wretch! Thou hast broken the laws of gods and sorcerers alike. By the sacred chains that hold my books, I command thee, return all thou hast stolen! Thou shalt release my wife, thou thief of both gold and glory. Failure brings upon thee the curse of eternal, agonizing fire! Tremble pirate, for the wizard's wrath is upon thee! Thou scallywag! Thinkest thou to flee with my secrets? I have beheld thy treachery in my crystal mirror. If thou dost not restore my stolen books and my wife to me immediately, I shall turn thee into a sea-serpent to be devoured by thy own foul crew. The power of the arcane is not meant for thieves. Thou art doomed to a grisly fate, of that I swear by my staff! Thou bilge-sucking thief! Thou hast dared to purloin my grimoires and lay hands upon my wife, the gentle lady Tabatha. Hearken to my malison: for this sacrilege, may thy skin turn to parchment, may the falling sickness seize thy limbs, and may the flames of hell consume thee forever and aye! Return my lore and my bride, or I shall rend thy soul from thy body with a whispered word, and noone shall find thy corpse in the deep! | image tagged in cats,medieval memes,cursed,thief,wizards,pirates | made w/ Imgflip meme maker
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by Calvinism_Sucks
58 views, 3 upvotes

I Shall Strip Thy Mind Of These Secrets

I Shall Strip Thy Mind Of These Secrets | I took thee as a son, and thou hast acted as a traitor. Thou hast twisted my spells, changing the high magic for lowly gains, and given them to a witch! Know thou, that magic misused returns threefold. A fool's act, to trade the secrets of the masters for the fleeting pleasure of a witch's coin. Thou thinkest thyself clever, but thou hast only acted as a thief in the night. The knowledge I gave thee is sacred, yet thou hast made it vile. Thy training is ended, and thou art branded a rogue mage. Thou false-hearted knave! Thou hast dared to tamper with the sacred arts and sell them for a pittance to that striga? Thou hast not only broken thy vow of silence but hast invited calamity upon us both. Thy folly shall be thy undoing; I shall strip thy mind of these secrets faster than a hanging causes the soul to flee! | image tagged in cats,medieval memes,wizards,witches,traitor,magic | made w/ Imgflip meme maker
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by Calvinism_Sucks
68 views, 2 upvotes

Thou Hast Stolen My Wife

Thou Hast Stolen My Wife | Hark, thou wretch! The stars have whispered thy foul sin unto me. Thou hast quenched a noble light, and now, thou shall burn in the fire of thy cursed deed. Vengeance is mine, and it shall be slow. So, it was thou, little worm. Thou hast broken a sacred bond. Think not to escape my gaze. I see thy sin written in the blood upon thy hands. Prepare thyself, for justice comes swiftly. Thou hast stolen my wife, my heart's treasure! For this, thou shalt pay, not in gold, but in torment, until thou prayest for the death that thou so cruelly gave! Thou base-born creature! Thou hast slain my wife! By the bones of my ancestors, I vow thee this: Thy soul shall know no peace, and thy body shall wither like a dying leaf in autumn. Tremble, for the wizard's wrath is upon thee! | image tagged in cats,medieval memes,wizards,peasant,cursed,murderer | made w/ Imgflip meme maker
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by Calvinism_Sucks
82 views, 2 upvotes

Thou Art A Bedswerver And A Cumberworld

Thou Art A Bedswerver And A Cumberworld | Hold thy thieving hand, thou base-born sea-robber! By the blessed bones of Merlin, thou art a reeky, rump-fed runagate to break into my sanctum. Didst thou think to plunder my sorcerous tinctures and vanish like a shadow? Nay, thou art trapped as a rat in a den of thieves. And attempting to lay hands on my lady? Thou art a bedswerver, a cumberworld, and a stinking miscreant who hath tempted the fate of hell. I could turn thee into a toads-paddock ere thou blinketh, but I shall give thee a taste of my magics instead. As I have caught thy hand in the jar, so too shall I bind thy soul to the lowest circle! | image tagged in cats,medieval memes,pirates,wizards,stealing,kidnapping | made w/ Imgflip meme maker
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by Calvinism_Sucks
85 views, 2 upvotes

Thy Hell-Brewed Potion

Thy Hell-Brewed Potion | Thou false witch! Thou hast stirred thy hellish bane Into my meat and brought me to the maw of death. Foul-hearted sorceress, I trusted thy nourishment, yet thou served me poison instead. Mine eyes have seen the shadows of the void because of thy dark arts. Know this: the same venom thou hast given me, I shall twist into a curse that shall blight thy kin to the ninth degree! By the arcane arts and the saints, thou hast committed a hideous sin. Thou thought me dead, but my spirit is stronger than thy hell-brewed potion! For this wicked craft, I shall turn thy blood to ice and thy soul to ash. Thou art a sorceress of the pit, and this day thy magic shall die with thee. Tremble, for my vengeance shall be swifter than the lightning! | image tagged in cats,medieval memes,archaic insults,wizards,witches,cursed | made w/ Imgflip meme maker
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by Calvinism_Sucks
84 views, 1 upvote

Thou Smell-Feast Knave

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by Calvinism_Sucks
116 views, 2 upvotes
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by Calvinism_Sucks
38 views, 2 upvotes, 1 comment

O, Thou Snake-tongued Shrew

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by Calvinism_Sucks
86 views, 2 upvotes, 2 comments

Halt, Thou Pribbling, Ill-nurtured Knave

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by Calvinism_Sucks
74 views, 3 upvotes
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by Calvinism_Sucks
44 views, 2 upvotes, 1 comment
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by Calvinism_Sucks
39 views, 2 upvotes, 1 comment

A Mandrake Mymmerkin--A Puppet With No Wit

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by Calvinism_Sucks
87 views, 2 upvotes, 5 comments

I Shall Curse Thy Bloodline To The Seventh Generation

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by Calvinism_Sucks
84 views, 2 upvotes, 3 comments