Am I a monster?

*me who doesn't have enough patience to read the whole thing*
sounds f**king lit

Lol

You couldn't have been further from the truth

i mean if there's a world where everyone is in agony all the time then it sounds cool

I want to create a world where:

The likeliness of stubbing your toe increases ten-fold and the chances of finding a rock in your shoe increase two-fold.

LEGO® bricks spontaneously appearing right where one places ones bare feet

Upon exiting any building, there is a small chance that your socks will suddenly become wet as if you stepped into a puddle. Despite no puddles will be present, however, and for an unknown reason, the outside of your shoe will remain dry.

Elevators always take too long to arrive on your floor to the point where taking the stairs is actually faster. Additionally, a small chance that pushing any button in the elevator will result in all present buttons being pushed.

Stairs always seem to have one less step than what you think, even if you look down at your feet.

Tripping occuring on a near-constant basis.

Wi-Fi being present throughout the entire world and the signal seems strong, however, lag is consistently present which leads to longer loading times. Additionally, ad-block is seemingly non-existent.

The chances of your computer crashing increase exponentially based on the importance and the amount of time you spent working on it since you last saved it.

And that any and all headphones will only ever have one working side. However, tests indicate that holding the headphone wire at a certain angle or turning the jack sometimes results in both sides working

No matter what number or combination of pillows you try it will always seem like they are stacked either too high or too low when trying to sleep with them

Blankets being oddly weighted in such a way where they will always fall to one side of the bed and leave a good portion of your body exposed.

Waking up after any duration of sleep usually results in one of your nostrils being clogged for some inexplicable reason.

Any food ordered at a cafeteria will either result in a notable component missing from the meal or a completely wrong order that is composed of your least favourite food(s)

Allergy symptoms will last twice as long.

Any food containing bones, particularly fish, will always result in the first bite you take having a bone fragment in it…no matter how careful you are in terms of removing bones.

There will always be at least one hair found in your food, regardless of whether or not it is made with anyone even near it. The length and type of hair tends to vary with each meal.

When shooting a spherical object into a basket of any sort (i.e., a basketball into a basketball net or a wadded up piece of paper into a waste bin) will result in a miss 99.9% of the time.

Showers never produce any hot water, just lukewarm water which decreases in temperature the longer you shower.

Shower curtains seem to be extra clingy

Soap bars are more likely to slip out of your hands, or slip off the shower shelf, resulting in your foot getting hit 100 percent of the time

If you try to wash your hands in a bathroom you will quickly find that nearly all soap dispensers are out of soap. Somwtimes, there will be one dispenser that barely has enough soap for a good wash.

Whenever you leave the bathroom, you will always leave with soggy sleeves despite your sleeve length. Regardless of whether you even touched water or not

Vending machines do not require any money, however, there is a 90% chance that your selected drink or snack will get stuck. Attempting to select another item to free the first item will result in both items getting stuck 60% of the time.

Any bags of chips found on this Level will contain a higher air-to-chip ratio. Likewise, sodas tend to become less carbonated faster, if not already lacking in carbonation.

There is a constant sound of insects buzzing can be heard in outdoor areas and next to your ears during nights whenever you try to sleep. Some wanderers have reported feeling these non-existent insects land on their skin.

Handling paper of any sort (i.e., sheets of paper, books, posters, etc.) almost always results in at least one paper cut.

Symmetry is not physically possible, therefore, floor tiles, wallpaper, and artistically arranged objects will always be slightly off-center. If you try to center asymmetrical objects there is a 100% chance that you will make it worse.

All doors creak when opened or closed and windows can either never be fully closed or are permanently stuck.

Pencils will always break when you attempt to use them on your first try and sharpening them takes approximately half of the pencil's length to accomplish.

Most pens you find are empty and those that do have ink run out of them after 50 seconds of use.

At least one of your fingers will always have a hangnail at any point of time.

I couldn't read past 5 ideas without cringing

this sounds like the type of society a fellow like me would love to live in!

Was this a copy pasta?

Technically? No

Concept and idea wise? Yes

Did u get this from somewhere?

Kinda, I edited the main idea so it'd be in a more realistic scenario/idea

Hmm, interesting

Hru btw

Okay

Noice