WELCOME TO THE LEGION OF DOOM! TELL ME, WHY SHOULD WE HIRE YOU AS OUR NEXT SUPERVILLAIN?! WELL YOU SEE I WORKED AT THE PAPER TOWEL COMPANY; AND I MADE SURE TO STOP THE PERFORATIONS ABOUT AN INCH FROM THE END OF THE ROLL; SO THE SHEETS ALWAYS TORE LIKE THIS; OH I LIKE THIS GUY, YOU'RE HIRED!