If there's any hostage taking going on, the Democrats are complicit

That's exactly what they did last time. Trump approved the budget even though he didn't like it, and the Democrats refused to discuss immigration.

Game theorists call it a time-inconsistency problem. Once you give someone else what they want, they have no reason to give what you want even if they previously agreed to it. Trump doesn't appear to be falling for it, but I wish he'd call it out. Schumer's accusations of hostage-taking and tantrums also apply to the Dems.

Trump can propose legislation and the men and women of the congress will vote on it, according to their conscience and as representatives of the people who voted for them. That's simply how the system works. Trying to do an end run around congress is how authoritarians operate. Furthermore, the Democrats are willing to discuss border security, they just don't equate it solely with something as simplistic as a wall.

Usually, that is how it works and how it should work. The Democrats have been so butthurt about losing 2016 that they have behaved as the pedantic children they accuse Trump of being - and certainly his behavior somewht justifies. When he agreed to the temporary opening of the government, the Dems took a premature victory lap. Did they, especially Pelosi, really think that this president was just goingnto lay down and take it? That's not what he was hired for. He does not serve at the pleasure of Congress.

But now we are in horrible situation. This seems to be a crisis of control. We seem to be being given a choice between the dominance of a mercurial and oft times tyrranical president or the anarchy and impotence of a divided Congress. With the former, sure the trains run on time, but you're not allowed to go anywhere. With the latter, you're free to go wherever you want, but there's no escape.