She's worth every moment of the heartache we've caused each other, and much more

That is a woman you fight for. Someone who doesn't want to "pull you down" cares about your happiness, so, if she makes you happy, tell her you want to help her "clean up messes" for the rest of your life! I speak from experience; my husband tried to break up with me during the first year because his life was so messed up. I bucked him, and here we are 20 years and 2 kids later. If you know she's worth it, go to her, shovel in hand, and tell her you'll clean up any shit with her if it means you'll be together in the end!

Thank you for this comment. I really appreciate the encouragement. I'm glad to hear you and your husband stuck it out and fought for for each other. :)

I hope everything works out for you!

Trust me, I've done it.

((socrates))

True.

(((Yes)))

I want to ask for details but that would be impolite.

To each his own. :)

April 3rd will be our 36th anniversary. Two kids, financial roller-coaster, a lot of intolerance and a lot of tolerance. But I could never have made a better choice for a soul mate. Treat each other decently, talk a lot and take each other on a date every once in a while.

Sweet! Thanks, Moshii. :)

ok firstly, whats with the -1 ups on your comment dude? damn.

secondly, to avoid the rather cliche-ness of choccies, it helps if you have a decent chocolatier you can go to. we have one nearby that does some of the most awesome designs you have seen, trying to find if he has a website to show you. but get something she'd like, but not too fancy that she'd feel guilty about eating :)

http://nutpatchnougat.blogspot.com.au/ for instance the motorbike at the bottom of the page, they don't have very good photos but i went to their city store at the start of feb while at a boat show and was blown away. chocolate shoes, handbags, birds, bikes, coffee pots, it was amazing.

alternatively i was thinking - if those were her exact words, you could get involved in some kind of messy activity together and at the end be like "see? there's no one i'd rather be in a mess with!" if she has a sense of humour normally. i'm guessing this is someone who has times where she feels no self-worth etc, and that can be hard on both of you

Thanks for the tips, Moshii!

Two years ago, I would have been the first to offer advice. Now, I'm just another divorced guy after nearly 39 years of marriage. Still, most of the advice here is pretty sound.

Try playing her this - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0HMAVU1k7kg

It took me 48 years to realize that most of my crippling worries were self generated