Women wore dresses with wide skirts in centuries past for this exact reason. You've taken a more minimalist approach.

God is everywhere at once. Why wouldn't he be in schools? The problem isn't that God isn't there. The problem is that nobody in public schools asks for God's guidance. These school shootings happen much more frequently in public schools than private schools.

Would a vannivorous creature eat vans? Would a trucknivorous creature eat trucks?

I'm glad that cats can play chess.

If the person in that bed was Bobby Knight, whoever pulled that stunt would find themselves looking at the ceiling of an ambulance.