"Hes got a club... HES GOT A CLUB-!!!!" Epic rppp

Dio: hmpf.. what a predicament this is..

I think you responded to the wrong place. You replied to me, not the creator

oops im sorry

im blind :sob:

No problem!

Dio: hmpf... what a predicament this is

Nico: Odisseo! Togliti di mezzo, dannazione! F**king MOVE! *the demigod ran up and grabbed the frozen king, yanking him back so he was facing the entrance and started pushing him. he passed him over to Eurylochus, eyes filled with murderous fire* Take him and keep him running. Go on! Get out of here! *Nico looked around at the dead, tapping his sword among their bodies as he passed their corpses. did Nico feel bad about trapping their souls to fuel his sword? . . . maybe a little bit- but he was sure that if they knew they were going to aid him in killing this asshole, they wouldn't mind too much*
*after all, someone needed to blind this asshole*

Hermes: uh... Other than that your king was just snatched up by the Cyclops and is about to be eaten.... *he sucks in a breath* yeah...

*Nico swore, using some no no words that I am not allowed to translate on this family-friendly website*
Nico: Excuse me, Lord Hermes. Um, thank you for your hospitality and not smiting me to death *Nico closed his eyes and prepared himself to shadow travel, and faltered. He blinked, trying again, and froze in terror once he realized he was too exhausted to teleport back to the cave*

*he stared for a moment, then realized... But didnt seem all too concerned*
Hermes: Oooohh... I get it. Okay. Do you want to go back? I think Ody is fine-

Nico: *urgently* I need to go back. I need to make sure certain things don’t happen, but other things do *Nico fumbled in his pocket and pulled out a handful of drachmas, eyes serious and frantic as he tried to press them into Hermes’s hand* please, if you can, get me back there quick as possible

*he spun one across his fingers, then tossed it up, catching it. In the time Nico was focused on the coin, they were teleported/transported to a far corner of the Cyclops cave*

*Nico jumped as he dodged the drugged cyclops, gasping in shock and surprise. he looked up, looking at Odysseus and starting to run to him. he stopped, looking back at Hermes, and hastily bowed*
Nico: Thank you, Lord Hermes, um, thank you *he ran over to Odysseus and began pulling him away* Odysseus, we have to go now. don't do anything else, no matter what anyone says, just listen to me and go

Odysseus: *he looked at him in shock* How did you-

Nico: *quickly* Let’s just say I know owe Lord Hermes a big ol’ favor in the future. Don’t ask *Nico pushed Odysseus back out of the cave and to the beach, sighing in relief as he successfully managed to get the king away from the Cyclops before he was able to reveal his name. There we go; there was at least ONE crisis avoided*
* . . . Of course, it wasn’t like a cere teleporting, demigod, child-of-hades would be hard to identify either, but I digress*

*several other heavy footsteps approach, and voices of other Cyclops fill the air*
"Who hurts you???"
Odysseus: Wait.

Nico: *in time w the literal music* f**k
*Nico steered Odysseus and himself closer into the shadows, shaking as he once again attempted to shadow travel and failed. The demigod peeked out at the Cyclopses- Cyclopsi? Cyclopse? What was the plural of Cyclops? No, not the time to be wondering that. Nico tried to count how many of them their were, feeling the color drain from his cheeks the more and more the number ticked up. he grabbed onto the rock they were hiding against, deciding that 16 was probably a good place to STOP counting as he almost felt like he was about to throw up*
*16 cyclops- no, 17 CYCLOPS because of Polyphemus . . . *
*Sometimes, Nico thought that his involvement just made things 10x worse*

*after they repeated the question, Polyphemus finally answered in a miserable voice*
Polyphemus: It was nobody-
*Odysseus for some reason thought that was funny shit*

*Nico, who'd already known the punchline of the joke, gave Odysseus a sharp look that basically screamed "shutupshutupshutupshutup!". the demigod had to suppress a groan and fidgeted as he waited for the cyclops to fvck off and leave already. he turned to Odysseus and said in a very, very soft tone*
Nico: whatever you do, do not reveal your name. I will personally stick you through with my sword- if you even consider it. understand?

*the king stared at him in shock for a moment*
Odysseus: ...Alright. If you insist.

*Nico nodded, mouthing thank you as the cyclops yelled for Polyphemus to be silent. he flinched at the noise, but eventually recovered and started urging Ody (and, by proxy, everyone else) towards the exit. cmon, cmon! can't these people move any faster?!*

*the few men that were left were crowded against the wall by the door, all trembling like children*
Odysseus: *silently counting his men and making sure Nico is close behind him*

(Hey Mate, you still alive?)

*Nico took out his sword and used it to steady himself as he joined the remaining men by the door, occasionally tapping dead bodies as he went along to suck up their soul energy. it'd been a while since he'd even remembered he could store soul energy, but now that he had the dead readily available to him- I mean, he might as well. the raven haired boy looked back quickly at the cyclops before gesturing for the remaining men to move*

(I have no idea where to go with that- where did my man go? I'm so sorry)

(That's ok XD! I was aiming to give you some creative freedom to shove him anywhere, but I'll just plop him on Olympus. who knows? maybe this will be where Neeks meets Hermes this time~?)

*Nico tried to sit up and collapsed back down, whimpering in pain as he hit his head on the marble dais behind him*
Nico: Ahi! Gesù Cristo-! *he looked behind him, blinking at the winged caduceus carved in gold on the marble behind him. a caduceus?* . . . Ermete?

(Ermete is Hermes's Italian name)

(Sorry, I just really wanna make sure I don't upset people and I give everyone their desired rp)

Hermes: *his little giggle echoed through the space* Well whos this?

(Np! You’re really nice for doing that ^w^)

*Nico’s eyes widened (though the corners still had a few tears in them from hitting his head and getting literally FLUNG ACROSS THE CAVE BY A CYCLOPS) and he blinked, unable to form a coherent sentence as he took in the god’s appearance. By the gods . . . He was attractive. Internal Nico facepalmed at his own thoughts. Of course he would be attractive; do you KNOW how many children of Hermes there are??? Still, he wasn’t conventionally attractive though, more ethereal. In spite of himself, Nico felt his cheeks heat up with blush as he tried to formulate an intelligent response*

(Aw thx)

*he sat nearby on a marble ledge, grinning at nico. He didn't seem upset, he even seemed amused*
Hermes: Well isn't it sweet for a child of Hades to think of me~?

*Nico blinked blankly before shaking his head quickly and closing his eyes. Get it together, go***mnit. He took a breath before sitting up a bit straighter (kinda) and gave Hermes as much of a bow as he could*
Nico: **stumbling* h-hello, Lord Hermes. I- um, I’m- um . . . I’m sorry for the, um, i-intrusion . . . Of your temple . . .

*he sighed, waving a hand*
Hermes: oh ho no... I'm not much on formalities. It's no problem... Really. *he gave nico a sly smile*

*Nico swallowed and looked away, before his head snapped up like a shot and his eyes widened*
Nico: merda . . . Odysseus! *the boy tried to stand, but almost fell and grabbed onto the Dias instead* woah!

*he spawned next to Nico, helping him stand*
Hermes: Woah- hold on. I'm sure the king is fine- *he paused, then his face paled- for a gods anyway* Oh no.

*Nico winced at his reaction and groaned. He looked at Hermes with one eye, looking pained*
Nico: *sadly* do I even wanna know?

(Also, you'll never guess what Epic character I'm being for Halloween.)

(OOH~ LEMME THINK! Ummmmm, Hermes?)

(Nope. Another person in my friend group is being him :))

(Ooh, ok, hmmmm, Odysseus?)

(Still nope, taken. But I give you a hint ^^ I am the prophet. With the answers you seek-)

(THE PROPHET!!!!)

(Lmao yes- with the answers you seek. )

Eurylochus: *taking Odysseus's arm* He'll kill us all if he corners us-
Odysseus: *in a soft, almost haunted tone* Polities......
*In the background the Cyclops crushed another man, spraying blood across the dusty ground*

Nico: EHI! Circle-eye! *The demigod ran towards the Cyclops, pausing in its giant shadow* Look down, testa di cazzo!

("Ehi" = "Hey")
(Testa di cazzo = D!ckhead)

(I'm basically basing this of my favorite Survive animatic. In the timing of events anyway, just a btw ^^)

*the Cyclops paused before crushing another man, who scurried to his feet and ran*
Polyphemus (probably wrong with the spelling): *his voice shook the stone walls* Who....?

(You got it right!)

Nico: *goading* C'mon, Circle-Eye! I wanna look you in the eye while we fight! *Nico motioned for the other men to keep running as he ran between Polyphemus's legs and behind him* Ehi Idiota! Coglione! Can't you move any faster? I'm already behind you!

(So, fun fact, 'Coglione' is almost always used as an insult like 'jerk', but it actually means 'testicle')

*The Cyclops slowly turned to face Nico, a pair of... All too familiar glasses near his feet*
Polyphemus: You....

(LMFAO)

(Nico’s essentially saying “hey, balls for brains! Over here!”)

*Nico looked down and swallowed, picking up the glasses and pocketing them in his Aviator jacket’s inner breast pocket. He looked back up at Polyphemus before making a show of looking at the ceiling above the Cyclops’s head and twisting his expression to fear/surprise*
Nico: *pointing up* ABOVE YOU!

*the stupid ass Cyclops looked up, but only a glance before swinging his club at Nico*

*Nico cursed under his breath; that didn't work as planned. Nico quickly shadow-traveled out of there, reappearing as he fell from the ceiling, sword pointed beneath him, right towards the Cyclops's eye. he jabbed it in, smiling a bit before his soul-sucking magic weapon began to slide down the huge eye- cutting it, but also leaving Nico steadily closer and closer to slipping. Nico's eyes widened, beginning to flail as he slipped, twisting his sword to stop slipping. he gasped for breath as he stuck, trembling as he made the mistake of looking down*

*he had to be over a 100 feet in the air. Odysseus and Eurylochus looked like ants. The Cyclops bellowed in pain, trying to swat at Nico*

*Nico wrapped his legs around Polyphemus's finger, allowing the Cyclops to pull him out and unstick him, allowing himself to be pulled along even if it meant getting thrown*
*Speaking of getting thrown-*
Nico: no, nonononono-! *Nico screamed as he was flung across the cave, fear grabbing hold of him like a vice before he shut his eyes, covered his head and ears, and shadow-traveled himself quickly out of there. he hit the ground, coughing in pain as he rolled over to his hands and knees and coughed. well, he was certainly out of the cave. Nico looked around, not knowing where he was. in his desperation and panic, he had shadow-traveled without picking a destination. f**kkkkk, f**kf**kf**kf**kf**k, this was not good; where the hell was he?! he was inside a temple of some kind of mountain, but who's temple and why, Nico didn't know. it wasn't something belonging to Hades; his stuff was primarily in the underworld. it wasn't Poseidon, he knew that for sure. Not Zeus, or Hera, or Aphrodite or Aries or (gods forbid) Dionysus*
*So where the HELL was he?!*