.

As I walk through the valley where I harvest my grain
I take a look at my wife and realize she's very plain
But that's just perfect for an Amish like me
You know, I shun fancy things like electricity
At 4:30 in the morning, I'm milkin' cows
Jebediah feeds the chickens and Jacob plows, fool
And I've been milkin' and plowin' so long that
Even Ezekiel thinks that my mind is gone
I'm a man of the land, I'm into discipline
Got a Bible in my hand and a beard on my chin
But if I finish all of my chores, and you finish thine
Then tonight, we're gonna party like it's 1699
We been spending most our lives
Livin' in an Amish paradise
I churned butter once or twice
Livin' in an Amish paradise
It's hard work and sacrifice
Livin' in an Amish paradise
We sell quilts at discount price
Livin' in an Amish paradise
A local boy kicked me in the butt last week
I just smiled at him and I turned the other cheek
I really don't care, in fact I wish him well
'Cause I'll be laughing my head off when he's burning in Hell
But I ain't never punched a tourist even if he deserved it
An Amish with a 'tude?
You know that's unheard of
I never wear buttons but I got a cool hat
And my homies agree I really look good in black, fool
If you come to visit, you'll be bored to tears
We haven't even paid the phone bill in 300 years
But we ain't really quaint, so please don't point and stare
We're just technologically impaired
There's no phone, no lights, no motorcar
Not a single luxury
Like Robinson Crusoe
It's as primitive as can be
We been spending most our lives
Livin' in an Amish paradise
We're just plain and simple guys
Livin' in an Amish paradise
There's no time for sin and vice
Livin' in an Amish paradise
We don't fight, we all play nice
Livin' in an Amish paradise
Hitchin' up the buggy, churnin' lots of butter
Raised a barn on Monday, soon I'll raise another
Think you're really righteous?
Think you're pure in heart?
Well, I know I'm a million times as humble as thou art
I'm the pious guy the little Amlettes wanna be like
On my knees day and night, scorin' points for the afterlife
So don't be vain and don't be whiny
Or else, my brother, I might have to get medieval on your heinie
We been spending most our lives
Livin' in an Amish paradise
We're all crazy Mennonites
Livin' in an Amish paradise
There's no cops or traffic lights
Livin' in an Amish paradise
But you'd probably think it bites
Livin' in an Amish paradise

my dad loves weird al

I thought this character had hooves at first.

💀..

Same

Same

???%

pepperoni :3

So cuteeee%

I didn't draw it tho I was just trying to show a pepperoni (and only that, no pizza)

I liek pepperoni :3

So real

I JUST SAW AN AARP AD AND WHEN I LOOKED UP IT WAS ALL AARP SERVICES APART FROM DENNYS IM DYING LAUGHING 😭😭😭

hey are you a an artist because that's a nice drawing

Specialty unlocked!

[Uhhh%]

is that a high number

No

It's more of a confused number

idk
those are nice drawings :3

Thank you :>

Np

Kill yourself 😎

100%

Hush lil bro

I'll do another dick reveal just to spite you. I still have the image of the tall naked black guy

don't threaten me with a good time

Last time you blocked me

i have dementia i gorgot

Omg no

0% but so real

Tfym 0

You have irked my attention

But it didn't make me blush bro

What's with tryna make you blush

I just wanted to say kys to someone

Real

Playing minecraft 1.0 is even realer

Facts

Bout to make a giant dirt tower to the height limit so that I can search for sheep

To bad it's raining

Mods this is satire

*shoves p**is in mouth* (restraining order rizz)

-googolplex%

Works every time

Like 10% or smth

Idfk

You should give yourself a piece of that oxygen

Huh%

Ok

Yuh

A BOMB IS STRAPPED TO MY CHEST!!!

What??%

Mon amour~
Tu est tellement mignon et beau~

Cause I'm eepy

Oki doki mon jolis~

100%

@///m///@

Hehehehe~
J'adore quand tu rougis
C'est tellement adorable~

Aaaaaaaa stop itttttt

@/////m/////@

Tellement chaud et sexy~
Je t'aime tellement mon amour~
Mon choux a la crème~~
Mon petit macaron~~~

>//////m//////<

<333333

Bet make a post about how much u love when I flirt with u like that babe~~

Noooooo

Do it~~~ hehehehehehehehehehehehehheheheehehhhehehehehehehehheehe

Fine babe but not right now

Why?

U forgot to do something babe~

A-alright

Veeeery good boy~~