Tell me Why?

Your mom so fat that not even the weather man could predict that

a kid said: "your taste of music doesn't matter at all."
I replied: "you know what else doesn't matter at all? your existence"

Yo momma so fat she hit the ground while skydiving and made a hole in the ground

A kid at school (who was very annoying) was standing by a window, exclaiming that there were ducks in the nearby pond. I walked over to him and said “You see those ducks? Count them.” He counted the ducks and said there were three. The I said “That’s how many brain cells you have.” He was confused and said “Huh?” And I replied by saying “Exactly.”

Bro💀

What?

It was the perfect roast 💀

thank you

Infact yo mamma so fat she is classified as mt everest

Mean kid was complaining about me being homeschooled and that makes me have no social skills (being homeschooled has nothing to do with it) and I said at least homeschoolers are polite and actually decent humans. Everyone at the table agreed so they shut up. It was amazing.

If I said that to the jerks at my school they would just come up most stupidest but smartass comeback.

This particular bully does not have great IQ

Yes like half of them

Ikr

All the bullies do at my school is vape and act like the rules don't apply to them

Ikr. My school has so many kids who openly talk about the drugs they use. It’s sad tbh.

wtaf. its like as soon as you graduate elementary school that everyone instantly turns into punks

Yes

Glad you and me are not like that

Me too

calling a kid a parasocial p*nis

I never tell good roasts. The closest thing to a roast that i said was this story: My bully told me: F*ck u so i said the same thing back

Ya true story

I'm really lame and pretty unfunny but here it goes... So I (for some stupid reason) got into an argument with one of my friends about whether they or my crush was objectively better looking. I told them that people find different things attractive, and that comparing them with my crush was like comparing apples to apples. They responded by saying that it wasn't apples to apples, but rather apples to durians (a durian is a spiky, smelly, kind of gross fruit). I replied "You being the durian, I'd assume?" and they were so mad.