I'm sorry, I didn't intend to hurt you at all. Again, It's not my intention to cast judgement—and it's certainly not my place to judge either. I'm really trying to help provide some insight.
Being drawn toward a morally forbidden relationship is not an active sin; it is a temptation. Sin occurs when we dwell upon the wrong thoughts, the temptation spawns, or when we choose to yield to the temptation. Our natures have been so infected with sin that what is evil often looks good to us. Sin causes us to see the world and our own actions through a warped perspective. Our thoughts, desires, and dispositions are all affected. Scripture says we are sinners by nature (Romans 5:12). So, same-sex attraction is not always an active, willful sin, but it springs from the sinful nature. Same-sex attraction is always, on some level, an expression of the flesh, or the fallen nature.
It is technically true that Jesus did not specifically address homosexuality in the Gospel accounts; however, He did speak clearly about sexuality in general. Concerning marriage, Jesus stated, “At the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate” (Matthew 19:4–6). Here Jesus clearly referred to Adam and Eve and affirmed God’s intended design for marriage and sexuality. God’s character does not change with culture’s opinion (Malachi 3:6; Numbers 23:19; Hebrews 13:8).
Yes, God created each of us the way we are for a reason, but not always for the reason(s) we think or expect. Don't stop at the conclusion that this is who you are meant to be and that it's impossible to change, as I once did. Always keep an open mind and pray, asking God to guide and lead you.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.” (Proverbs 3:5-6)
Jesus said, “With man it is impossible, but not with God. For all things are possible with God.” (Mark 10:27)
Again, PLEASE don't take this as an attack on you; it is NOT my intent to judge, attack, or hate on you or anyone else, and I apologize if it does come across that way. I really do try to be understanding, and I truly want to help you.
Whatever you are going through, I'll pray for you.
God bless you, and Merry Christmas!