It was a STRETCH, but I used all the puns!  I would have LINT you one, but that's a TWIST best left to SOAP operas.  I usually WASH them at two-SHIRTy.  My motto is live and let DRY.  We should HANGOUT sometime.  I put a knife in the laundry because I want to look RIPPED, on the edge of CUTTING fashion.  When it comes to softener I like robert DOWNY.