One Does Not Simply

I can't respond with meme comments, so I am at a disadvantage. You seem to be equally disadvantaged by your visible lack of imagination. I just zanged you. I suggest you take a break, bro.

As always, with affection and affectation. Keep it real and keep 'em coming. I know you have some valuable material somewhere in that salad brain of yours.

So, you're being a jackass because I've never heard anybody say "twain an oreo"? A decent person would simply explain.

I thought we were engaging in meme warfare; I explained that I was disadvantaged, going on to expound upon the source of aforementioned disadvantage, so I endeavored to level the playing field with text alone. It seems that we are enmeshed in a thicket of misunderstanding. Please accept my humblest apologies, and slow your roll, retard.

Okay, that was rude. I sincerely apologize and hope not to further inconvenience you. I am new to this site and am without culture regarding its peculiar customs pertaining particularly to etiquette. Also it just wasn't that funny, which is likely the most greatly exhibited infraction. My first response was supposed to be silly, but, I suppose, one cannot infer intention from dry, lifeless text. "Twain" is a slightly antiquated way of saying "to part" or "separate." I thought it would lend itself well to parodying the sort of colloquy intrinsic to the "Lord of the Rings" universe.

I am not a trusting person by nature, so I find it hard to accept an apology that's followed by "slow your roll, retard" (which is a name that automatically incites some anger in me as it is often attributed to certain conditions including autism which my son has. Of course, this is a detail you couldn't have known so I will not sling back), let alone an apology for the "apology" even if it was sincere. My inability to trust is also not your fault, so I will now apologize for any sincerity that didn't get picked up on. Also, I couldn't get into Lord of the Rings, so the reference is lost on me. However, I do appreciate that you finally explained it to me.