Neanderthals had to deal with this because they didn't have or maybe know how to use contraceptives. I guess some survived to the modern age

Abstain. Use a condom. Use birth control pills. If all fails, use Plan B pills. Women have ample time to prevent a pregnancy with all these real choices. But aborting a baby because you changed your mind after the fact isn't a choice, it's murder

That's some high quality comedy right there

I'd let her wash me

Oh I've been there. Sometimes it feels like I'm losing a soulmate... maybe in another universe we're friends