She should wear that shirt more often, she'd get plenty of attention.

White is a very attention-grabbing color

This happens to me for the same reason I get the feeling my bedroom walls are glad they don't have eyes.

Wait that's not what I meant

This right here is the reason why Deadpool is the new spiderman.

Colored wax turns me on

It will if you give it long enough, but upgraded to being fuzzy and blue this time.