I'm pretty sure Charlie Brown's grandfather, Silas, actually did fight in World War 1 though.

Don't get me wrong, I'm satisfied with the phone I have, but if a phone actually could survive that, I'd buy the crap out of it.

Agreed.

Oh god, we've actually gotten to the point where the Wii U is considered "retro."

Agreed, but the bar is so unbelievably low that even a dead fish would have been a better mascot than Doug ever could be.