Inkmatas: is this a potato?

This is a beautiful looking house
OH GOD WHERE DID YOU GET THAT-

Inkmatas: what do you mean?

The grenade thingy you’re holding! Why do you have that?

I don’t even know what am I supposed to do here

F**K.

What-

I made a spelling mistake 4x in a row

It ok dw <3

Oh I’m stupid I didn’t see the grenade png

Thats a house

Inkmatas: Hm?

Potato

It gernade

max: ...you didn't pull the pin, did you

Inkmatas: *getting calm* Thank you.

Inkmatas: What pin?

M: the pin on the... *ahem* potato

Inkmatas: Oh you mean this? *She pulls the pin*

*max quickly grabs it and throws it out the window, then generates a purple force field around them*

*The grenade explodes*
Inkmatas: OH GOSH!

M:that was a grenade, hon... you okay?

Inkmatas: *Frightened* Yeah…

M:well this is certainly a way to meet someone... I'm max by the way

Inkmatas: I-I’m Inkmatas.

M: well, that's a nice name *he smiles, completely forgetting the forcefield*

Eggy: Oh, thanks, I was hungry!
*he grabs it and swallow it whole, he coughs up the pin*

*Eggy blows up*

*A loud boom comes from Eggy's inside, he keels over and grabs his stomach*
Eggy: Ow... That wasn't what potatoes are supposed to do...

Astra: O_O

Inkmatas: What?

Astra: that's... Not a potato.

Inkmatas: What do you mean?

Astra: *deep breath* that's a grenade

Inkmatas: *Looks at the grenade* Oh-

Astra: why'd you think it was a potato though

Inkmatas: *Pulls up this video* this is why
https://youtube.com/shorts/DGmgnc4o_Wg?si=wbFre_asQL4mvOC8

Astra: potatoes don't have detonators, inky

Inkmatas: ao3iks.gif (click to show)

Astra: O_Q

Virtual: I… darling, I must admit that is shaped like a potato but… How about you just put that thing down? I wouldn’t recommend holding it so casually..

Inkmatas: What do you mean? *Grabs the pin*

Virtual: *a low static buzz can be heard from his screen for a split second, the tension of the room rising abruptly even though Inkmatas seems absolutely oblivious to the danger* I wouldn’t recommend you to that, my dear… do not.. pull.. the pin..

Inkmatas: *Looks at the “potato” and sees its a grenade* OH SHOOT!

Virtual: Yeah now you know that is not a potato! Put that thing down!

Inkmatas: *Puts the grenade down* I’m so sorry T^T

Virtual: No no! No need to apologize, my dear.. *he steps forward and gently pulls her close, petting Inkmatas’ head gently* I bet you DIDNT even know what it was.. just… be careful alright? And remember.. potatoes obviously don’t have pins.

Inkmatas: Thank you… *Sad*

Virtual: oh… now now.. why are you sad..? *behind her, a disembodied gloved hand appears and silently takes the grenade away*

Inkmatas: *Sad Inkling noises* I’ve been struggling to understand if I have a purpose or not. I am biologically incapable of having children, I don’t have any attraction to men, and I screwed over the only guy who tried dating me…

(This gave me an absolutely horrible idea and also how much lore am I missing?!!)

Virtual: ah… *he slowly and very gently leans forward to hug her* Dont worry… it’s okay… I’ll try my best to help you… I’ll solve it…

Inkmatas: I have a girlfriend-

Virtual: hahah! I know! That doesnt stop me from finding a way to help you eventually, dont worry…

Inkmatas: What do you mean?

Virtual: hah… well… I.. am not so sure yet, but.. I’ll find out a way to help in at least one of your issues you just told me about.. *even though he has one eye, he makes an expression that easily represents a wink gesture*

Inkmatas: *Sighs* I’m alright, I have a child who is sort of like a biological child.

Virtual: *he actually freezes for like a whole 3 seconds* …huh?

Inkmatas: She’s a clone but yeah

Virtual: …tell me more.

Inkmatas: Her name is Inky Pearl. She is a clone child of mine. I love her dearly

(I am actually speechless rn I thought they were just like sisters or smth)
Virtual: …go on… tell me more…

(I literally rping with Virtual and IP on a separate post-)