Turn around, Link, it'd be a crime
If I had to go back on the promise that I made for you
So don't step over that line
Or else, friend, you're gonna have a bad time
But kids like you don't play by the rules
And guys like me can't give credit to insolvent fools
So just go, before my patience drains quicker
And don't come back 'til you're a little RICHER!
Go ahead and try to buy it if you're able
Guess you know my prices aren't negotiable
I can tell you're gеtting really sick of trying
But I think you're just mad you keep dying
You're not gonna win, wе'll be here together
Haggling in my item store forever
I know that there is nothing cheap about 'em
But you cannot beat the game without 'em
I know you've got
Ru-u-u-u-bies, ru-u-u-u-bies
Ru-u-u-u-bies
For...
Lamp oil, rope, and bombs
Lamp oil, rope, and bombs
Lamp oil, rope and bombs
I know I'm selling
Everything you're searching for
But if you want to afford it, well
You better grind some more
And no matter how I stall you
You won't give up and go home
Is it really worth all this trouble
Just to bomb some dodongos?
Go ahead and try to buy it if you're able
You should know by know that credit's off the table
Think that you can try to scam me like I'm some pawn?
Well I don't have time for beggars so get Morshed on
I know you've made my customers disappear
But everything they cared about is why I'm here
I am their MERCY
I am their POWER
I am MONETIZATION
I know you've got
Ru-u-u-u-bies, ru-u-u-u-bies
Ru-u-u-u-bies
But I think I'm
RICHER THAN YOU

I think I'm more of a [[BIG SHOT]] than you

[[Hyperlink Blocked]] [[Silly Strings]] [[Cungaderos]]
YOU WANT IT? [[Congratulations!!!!]] IT’S YOURS, [[Little Sponge]]. AS LONG AS YOU HAVE ENOUGH [[Kromer]].

[[TURN]] AROUND, LINK, OR IT'S A [SPECIL] CRIME
IF I GO BACK ON MY [HYPERLINK BLOCKED] PROMISE TO YOU.
DON'T CROSS THE LINE! OR, KID, YOU'LL HAVE A [BAD TIME].
BUT [[kids]] LIKE YOU BREAK THE RULES,
AND I CAN'T GIVE [CREDIT] TO [INSOVENCY].
SO, GO!!! BEFORE MY [PATIENCE] RUNS OUT LIKE [[HYPERLINK BLOCKED]],
AND DON'T COME BACK 'TIL YOU'RE [[A LITTLE RICHER]]!
GO ON, [[BUY IT!!!]] IF YOU CAN AFFORD IT,
YOU KNOW MY [[PRICES]] ARE NON-NEGOTIABLE.
YOU'RE GETTING SICK OF THIS, I CAN [[SMELL]] IT.
BUT YOU'RE JUST MAD YOU KEEP [[D I E D]].
YOU WON'T [[WIN]], WE'RE STUCK TOGETHER,
BARGAINING IN MY [[ITEM SHOP]] [FOREVER].
I KNOW IT'S NOT [[CHEAP]],
BUT THE GAME'S IMPOSSIBLE WITHOUT 'EM!!
I KNOW YOU'VE GOT...
RU-U-U-U-BIES, RU-U-U-U-BIES
RU-U-U-U-BIES
FOR...
[LAMP OIL], [ROPE], AND [BOMBS].
[LAMP OIL], [ROPE], AND [BOMBS].
[LAMP OIL], [ROPE] AND [BOMBS]!
I'M SELLING... EVERYTHING YOU [[NEED]].
BUT AFFORD IT? BETTER GRIND [MORE]!
NO MATTER HOW I [[STALL]], YOU REFUSE TO [[GIVE UP]].
IS IT WORTH IT? JUST TO BOMB SOME DODONGOS?
GO ON, TRY TO [[BUY IT]] IF YOU [ARE ABLE],
YOU KNOW I DON'T DO [CREDIT, KID]!
TRY TO [SCAM] A [[NUMBER 1 RATED SALESMAN 1997]] LIKE ME?
I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR BEGGARS, GET [Morshed] ON!
YOUR [[CHOICES]] DISAPPEARED,
BUT THE THINGS THEY [CARE] IS WHY I'M HERE!
I AM THEIR [[MERCY]]
I AM THEIR [[POWER]]
I AM [[MONETIZATION]]
I KNOW YOU'VE GOT...
RU-U-U-U-BIES, RU-U-U-U-BIES
RU-U-U-U-BIES
BUT I THINK I'M... [[RICHER THAN YOU]]

oh ok