Yeahhh i would lose my mind and end up killing somebody if you were to do that.
I don't want you to hurt yourself, and i don't want to hurt myself either (i sadly did today). I would really miss you and be in a shitload of pain if you kill yourself.
No. If you kill yourself, you’ll never see a happy ending. If you want to feel better, start making plans for a better future and then act on them. Pursue self improvement relentlessly. Before long your life will be turned completely around.