I am sorry to hear that. I am not foreign to self-harm. Sometimes it feels like it's the only way to cope with life. Now that I am older I know that it is important to reach out to someone in order to let those deep-seated emotions out in a healthier way, and also to develop strategies when those emotions surge, like writing, drawing, or audiorecording, even if people may find the content disagreeable it does not matter none, it's putting it out there that matters. What's out there can't hurt us, only what we keep inside.