When I was a “wage slave” in my youth, my transmission went out and I didn’t have the cash to get it fixed. My employer found out (I didn’t tell him, I don’t know how he found out) about it and gave me the money to get it fixed. Later, when I had the money to pay him back, he told me to keep it and save it.
It’s all about attitude, and your attitude is your biggest problem. Stop whining and get your shit together.