bruh so im tryna quit band rn right?
now i didnt know this but im apparrently one of the favorites of my band directors so now theyre pissed that im quitting band and theyre harassing me and trying to gaslight me into not quitting.
theres 3 band directors right
so one of them already had a discussion w me abt quitting on thursday and i explained my reasons for quitting and i thought it would be over with
then they all 3 cornered me in the band office on friday and tried to gaslight me into staying saying things like "what kind of therapist would encourage quitting the things you love"
i tried to explain that my anxiety causes me to have severe panic attacks where i literally stop breathing and they just treated it like an excuse talkin bout "well we could help u but u never talk to us"
i actually ended up having a panic attack as soon i was released from that conversation and ended up in my counselors office for an hr
my panic attacks are hella serious where i literally can feel my throat closing and find a lot of difficulty breathing, my body pretty much shuts down. i cant think, i can barely breathe, plus a whole lot of other things i wont go into detail about.
the weird part is its not like theyre doing this to everyone, they talk to other ppl who wanna quit and they let them go peacefully, saying "bye"
why is it me being harassed
talkin bout some "ur too talented to quit. are u really gonna leave ur friends? i see that u made friends, u just gonna leave them?" like im not leaving my friends im jus leaving this organization
i felt so invalidated the way they wrote off my mental and physical pain as excuses like they were like "are u quitting math? are u quitting history? then why quit band?"
now to a lot of you this may not seem like a big deal but to a short person with severe anxiety, depression, and other issues, being cornered in a closed room by 3 tall adults and being intensely interrogated, pressured, and gaslighted by said people, is f**king terrifying and for me, will induce an anxiety attack. i really don't think that's ok at all, especially when i already said no and explained my reasons. they really should've just listened to me the first time & took no for an answer. idk.
