a man pooping so hard after eating taco bell he leaves the atmosphere, finds the end of the universe, breaks the wall, the other side is heaven, god thinks hes dead and judges him, he poops all over god, god sends him to hell, he poops all over the devil, satan sends him to valhala, he poops all over odin, odin sends him to mount olympus, he poops all over zeus, zeus finally realizes he hasnt died yet and sends him back to earth where he finds out that tentacle octopus alien people are invading,
and the only way to defeat them is with his super-powered poop! With a mighty battle cry of "Taco Bell gives me strength!", he unleashes a tsunami of poop that engulfs the tentacle octopus alien invaders, sending them back to their home planet in disgust. As the hero stands victorious amidst the wreckage, he realizes that he has become the defender of Earth, armed with his unstoppable weapon: the power of his bowels. And so, he embarks on a new journey, protecting the world from any future extraterrestrial threats, one epic poop at a time.
I wasted so much time writing this. Please tell me I was the only person to ever think this.