Once upon a time, in a forest not too far from the town of Freedomville, there lived a young girl named Red Riding Hood. She was known for her bright red cape and her fearless spirit. One day, as she was walking through the forest to visit her grandmother, she heard a rustling in the bushes.
Out from the shadows emerged the Big Bad Wolf, with gleaming eyes and a hungry look. But before the Wolf could even think about pouncing on Red Riding Hood, it suddenly found itself engulfed in a massive explosion of smoke and fire.
500,000 pounds of American Freedom had descended upon the forest, in the form of airstrikes, artillery bombings, helicopter and gunship rounds, battleship batteries, M4 fire from the local Marines, and a plethora of landmines.
The Wolf was caught completely off guard, as explosions rocked the forest and trees splintered into pieces. Red Riding Hood, protected by the magical cloak of American Freedom, watched in amazement as the Wolf tried to flee, only to be met with more explosions and gunfire.
In the end, the Big Bad Wolf was no match for the might of American Freedom. It whimpered and ran off into the depths of the forest, never to be seen again. Red Riding Hood continued on her journey to her grandmother's house, safe and sound thanks to the power of freedom and firepower.
And so, the tale of Red Riding Hood and the Big Bad Wolf became a legend in Freedomville, a reminder that no matter how big or bad the enemy may seem, with enough firepower and freedom, they can be defeated.
