7 little Marios sharing a tub
One fell out and got on the hub
Momma spanked his [redacted] and sent him to the shelter
Guess he's gonna spend the rest of his life on welfare

6 little Marios sharing a tub
One jumped out when he saw a cat cub
He stroked it gently, and it brightened little kitty's mood
Till he threw it in the oven and made Instant Chinese Food

5 little Marios sharing a tub
They had a group youtube, but one wasn't subbed
So they yesterday him out and roasted him for dinner
No wonder Daddy's been saying we need to get thinner

4 little Marios sharing a tub
One jumped out to join a nearby club
But he got wasted silly and was robbed
And soon he was forced to join a vicious mob

3 little Marios sharing a tub
One fell out in shock once seeing the GUTS Grammys snub
He got a firehose to try and settle the issue
But he got lost and returned home, only for the Marios to say "we didn't miss you!"

2 little Marios sharing a tub
One kicked the other out, saying, "Go climb that shrub"
He got halfway to the top - then fell down the tree
Which cut him in half, what an unfortunate place to be

1 little Mario with all the tub
Till the big monkey joined the club
Mario cried, saying he earned this tub
But Monkey said "Boo-hoo, mothertrucker! You're going south!"
and shoved his [redacted] straight down his mouth.

The End