And then the realist is trying to get their asses off the tracks before they die

The train:

Full steam ahead

Me who would've already ran away:

Blud stole the joke from someone else

The taxi driver wondering why there’s a train and two f*cking idiots in the shortcut tunnel

GET OUT OF THE WAY

I'm not an optimist or a pessimist, I'm the train driver, and I'm going to speed up

Death eating popcorn while watching this