MAGA, your terms are acceptable

The following terms & conditions apply:

1. The complained-of conduct must fall within the applicable statute of limitations (it’s a simple matter of law, sorry, my hands are tied on this);
2. The complained-of conduct must not have already been the subject of a prior plea deal (no double jeopardy — it’s in the Constitution!);
3. All evidence must satisfy strict chain-of-custody requirements (if any, say, laptops have an uncertain origin and/or passed through compromised hands on their way to the courtroom, then this might be a problem!)

But by all means, whatever you’re left with: fire away!