ue, ue (sound of crying)

Dicks are so cute omg(⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)⁄ when you hold one in your hand and it starts twitching its like its nuzzling you(/ω＼) or when they perk up and look at you like" owo nya? :3c" hehe ~ p**is-kun is happy to see me!!（＾ワ＾） and the most adorable thing ever is when sperm-sama comes out but theyre rlly shy so u have to work hard!!(๑•̀ㅁ•́๑)✧ but when p**is-kun and sperm-sama meet and theyre blushing and all like "uwaaa~!" (ﾉ´ヮ´)ﾉ*: ･ﾟhehehe~p**is-kun is so adorable (●´Д｀●)・:*:・

Remembering in 6th grade when I really had to fart but I was at the dinner table so i got up and went to the kitchen where nobody could see but i didn't want to stench to be stuck in my pants so i pulled my pants down and squatted so it didn't make any noise but i ended up shitting on the floor.

LMFAOOO

😇

Childhood☕

🥸 ☕

no copypasta is weird

When I was 21 I was too scared to poo at my boyfriend's house so I held it in and then at 3 am I couldn't hold it in any longer so I stood up to go toilet and diarrhoea gushed out all over his bedroom floor and all I could find was a sock then I snuck out and went home and in the morning he broke up with me via text.

TELL, HINDER, IDENTIFY, NEUTRALIZE, and KNOW.

i imagine some old cartoon character going "FLAMING FORESKIN" as his car shatters into glass

LMFAOOOO

how to make a pipe bomb (not real, joke) 1. put fire starter liquid in a small plastic bottle. 2 put a hole in the cap for some burning rope. once these steps are done, put the bottle in a pipe. now go and do a little trolling!

"Dance like no one's watching." Eh heh, that's something that I usually let others do.

But still, when Wanderlust called for help, I am the one who answered.

Night Swan cursed the danceverses, turning coaches into minions. What a bummer!

We need to gather a team to stop this!

The skillful Mihaly can push us to improve our dance moves.

The invigorating Brezziana, she can fill the team with energy!

And Jack Rose, with Night Swan being his mother, can we really trust him?

If we combine our strengths, we might have a chance against... her.

So, "Dance like no one is watching" you say? Well this dance battle is definitely on!

no matter what it says, its not weird cuz its a copypasta

Cook the pasta according to the package instructions.
Melt the butter in a large skillet over medium high heat. Add the garlic and cook for 30 seconds, or until fragrant.
Pour in the milk and cream. Stir consistently to avoid burning on the bottom of the pan until the mixture comes to a boil. Turn the heat down to medium, and mix in the parmesan cheese, salt, and pepper. Adjust the seasoning to your own taste.
Remove the pan from the heat and mix in the cooked pasta until the sauce begins to thicken. Garnish with parsley, and serve.

Everybody wanna be a superstar
Get a lot of money, drive fancy cars
Everybody wanna be a superstar
Get a lot of money, might not see tomorrow
Everybody wanna be a superstar
Get a lot of money, f**k fancy broads
Everybody wanna be a superstar
Get a lot of money, drive fancy cars
Stickin' to the models, yeah
Drinkin' out the bottle, yeah
What have you done to deserve this?
You gon' have to keep a gun if it's dirty
Spend a mansion on a car and park it in the slum
Got diamonds on me, got a Glock, holdin' thirty drum
We buss a check up down the middle, now it's figures
I packed the hood out on the jet when I first came up
Money brought pain before the fame, I was painless
Shit ain't the same, you get more money, it get more dangerous
It could be a motive when you litty and you famous
F**k on her few times, 'til it feel like she a stranger
Everybody wanna be a superstar
Get a lot of money, drive fancy cars
Everybody wanna be a superstar
Get a lot of money, drive fancy cars
Abu Dhabi trip with a US broad
Back to back Lambs, need a extra garage
Lamborghini keys, touch screen when it start
Smokin' on exotic, you can smell when it tar
Blicky, blicky, put an extendo on the FN with me
Let me spray it in the air, now it's sticky, sticky
We just came up from the dead, now I'm the shit-shit, yeah
Rose gold diamonds in my mouth when I smile, bitch
I just brought it to the spot, it changed the climate
I got bitches in the back and on the side of me
He didn't bring me all my racks so now he gotta leave
I just wanna smoke him 'cause he shot at me
Cash out in the mall, it's worth a quarter key
Bread gang, so we get a lot of keys
Prayin' to the God and my rosary
Everybody wanna be a superstar
Get a lot of money, drive fancy cars
Everybody wanna be a superstar
Get a lot of money, might not see tomorrow
Everybody wanna be a superstar
Get a lot of money, f**k fancy broads
Everybody wanna be a superstar
Get a lot of money, drive fancy cars

wo’ah, earf, birming’am, fish n’ chips… long ago, the fou’ nations live togedah in ah’mony. then ev’ryfing changed when the IRS attacked…. only the avatah, mastah of all fou’ elements could stop ’em but when the queen needed ‘im most, ‘e vanished. 100 yea’s passed and me bruv and i found the new avatah. a fish n’ chips bendah named aang. although ‘is chipbendin’ skills ah great, ‘e still ‘as a lo’ to lea’n ‘fore ‘e’s ready to save anyone m8.

AH SHIT WHERE THE F**K DID I PUT MY FNAF COPY PASTA

FIND IT

Sandy is my queen. Her tight squirrel body is so sexy I can't even think of it without coming. I haven't lost my virginity in 24 years of life because I can only lose it to her. One day I'm going to meet her and she'll become my owner. She'll keep me in a cage and let me out only to have sex. I can't even imagine. She would take me out of my cage and tie me to a table. She'd talk dirty to me in her sexy goofy voice. I'd have already come at that point and she would shit in my mouth as a punishment. "Do you like it, loser?", she'd taunt me as I almost choke in her godly brownies. After emptying her bowel into my throat she'd cut off my limbs and put them into a blender and make a smoothie. She'd force me to drink my mortal flesh while stroking my firetruck-red cock. I'd come with such force that my cum would turn into plasma. She'd bite my balls with her sexy squirrel teeth as a punisment for coming too quickly. Then she'd bandage my bloody stumps and put me in a baby cradle, treating me like her own squirrel baby. "Aww, you're so cute. Want some mommy milk, my love?" She'd make her breast milk my only source of food. I would not be able to resist anything she'd do to me because I'm limbless. I would become her live sex toy. After a day of loving she'd put me in the cradle, kiss me on the forehead, and say "Goodnight, sweetie." I'd sleep well, knowing that tomorrow I would get to serve her again, be her slave, be her pet.
I love you Sandy.

Wow. My copypasta has some tough competition

Today when I walked into my economics class I saw something I dread every time I close my eyes. Someone had brought their new gaming laptop to class. The Forklift he used to bring it was still running idle at the back. I started sweating as I sat down and gazed over at the 700lb beast that was his laptop. He had already reinforced his desk with steel support beams and was in the process of finding an outlet for a power cable thicker than Amy Schumer’s thigh. I start shaking. I keep telling myself I’m going to be alright and that there’s nothing to worry about. He somehow finds a f**king outlet. Tears are running down my cheeks as I send my last texts to my family saying I love them. The teacher starts the lecture, and the student turns his laptop on. The colored lights on his RGB Backlit keyboard flare to life like a nuclear flash, and a deep humming fills my ears and shakes my very soul. The entire city power grid goes dark. The classroom begins to shake as the massive fans begin to spin. In mere seconds my world has gone from vibrant life to a dark, earth-shattering void where my body is getting torn apart by the 150mph gale force winds and the 500-decibel groan of the cooling fans. As my body finally surrenders, I weep, as my school and my city go under. I hate gaming laptops.

Hey guys, did you know that in terms of male human and female Pokémon breeding, Vaporeon is the most compatible Pokémon for humans? Not only are they in the field egg group, which is mostly comprised of mammals, Vaporeon are an average of 3”03’ tall and 63.9 pounds, this means they’re large enough to be able handle human dicks, and with their impressive Base Stats for HP and access to Acid Armor, you can be rough with one. Due to their mostly water based biology, there’s no doubt in my mind that an aroused Vaporeon would be incredibly wet, so wet that you could easily have sex with one for hours without getting sore. They can also learn the moves Attract, Baby-Doll Eyes, Captivate, Charm, and Tail Whip, along with not having fur to hide nipples, so it’d be incredibly easy for one to get you in the mood. With their abilities Water Absorb and Hydration, they can easily recover from fatigue with enough water. No other Pokémon comes close to this level of compatibility. Also, fun fact, if you pull out enough, you can make your Vaporeon turn white. Vaporeon is literally built for human dick. Ungodly defense stat+high HP pool+Acid Armor means it can take cock all day, all shapes and sizes and still come for more

classic