This letter has been sent to you to stop you from sending out chain letters. The original was written in the 3rd century A.D. by a deranged member of the Most Holy Post. That version vanished during the Spanish Inquisition. More recently, it was communicated telepathically to Shirley MacLaine by monks on the planet Mongo in the eighth dimension. Now it has been sent to you. Good things will soon be happening to you if you follow the instructions given in this letter.
You must keep this letter for the next five years. If at any time during that time you receive a chain letter, don't send out any copies of it.
DO NOT IGNORE THIS LETTER. If you ignore it and send chain letters, nuclear war is a definite possibility. You will develop psoriasis, gout, hemorrhoids, herpes, and/or a common cold. Some day you will definitely unalive if you ignore this letter!!!!! Furthermore, your next-door neighbor will start a manure farm in his backyard and begin playing the bagpipe (late at night usually). You may even be forced to spend an evening with an accountant and an insurance salesman discussing their work.
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Tiff streams and threats of war; Dunno
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