i... I have been there to. it took so long to get over the fact that my parents never cared about me or that my brother is 2000 miles away, so i see ur struggle. i attempted death so many times, i had the guts to do that, but something stopped me, think about the future. if you had kids at the time, how would they feel if you died? or a wife or GF? Or your nextdoor neighbor that you baked banana bred for? I looked on the bright side of things. if nobody cares about you, well... i can. even if you're in another contry away from me, you can always text me on the imgflip meme chat if you need someone to talk to from 4 to 9 PM. im only thirteen, so if this helps at all, please let me know.