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I would but the cops found the kids in the basement

lmao

But they’ll find my girlfriend in the fridge if I tell you

Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone?

Because he got hit with a bus

Today was a great day
My ex got hit by a bus
And I lost my job as a bus driver!

Remember, if you get rejected from art school, you can always start a career in politics.

that do be kind tru tho

The w in Africa stands for water

hahahah

I would if they didn’t know where I hid the bodies

i like how jfk has an open-minded approach to everything since November 22, 1963

so was lincoln lol

I want to go to Africa they have chocolate lakes ((So many Africa jokes

I have as many as Africans has water

dis foo

What’s the difference between hitler and James Charles? Nothing, they both remove the polish with chemicals

*to the tune of Dreidel dreidel* Killing naked children that live in my basement!

you tell me one first

Did you know the f in orphan stands for family

Damn that joke was so dark the police almost shot it

A friend of mine invited me to the hospital to make a vegetable stew, they didn't end up tasting very well tho

a black man and a jew fall of a building which one dies first? the black man because chains fall heavier than ash.

Me:bro I saw a kid get hit by a bus
My friend:and I lost my job as a bus driver

Did you know that it’s impossible to dunk on an 80 foot hoop? Even on a helicopter? I mean, what do u think Kobe was doing?