RebelWoman. having addressed that issue already you are acting in rebellion against clear prohibition in scripture. And because of that, you must repent of it.
I know it is hard for you to accept it, and I for one have struggled with this issue for years, but it is what it is.
If you do not, then it could be a sign that you never believed in the first place as you have by denying the prohibitions, created another god to suit your own worldview. That is an act of Idolatry which is a serious sin (Exodus 20:4).
Please repent, for until you do, God will not hear your prayers (Habakkuk 1:13).
