Hey stop putting yourself down. You don't deserve to be left. I know what the pain feels like and it really hurts. It is ok not to be ok but you don't have to put yourself down. You are not a dumbass. I have seen your meme and no dumbass could make those memes. You only have control over yourself and how you choose to be as a person. As for others, you can choose to accept them or walk away. You can choose to change, be a good person that doesn't push away people or a person that hurts people and pushes them away.