I'm sorry you feel that way. But remember: you are a great person, and nobody hates you! (If there is somebody who hates you, they deserve to think about what they've done to you) Trust me, I've been there: I've believed that I was nothing, and that everyone secretly hated me and that I deserved to die. But there are always people who care about you, after all, what's the point of families and friends? They will always have your back. You should have a great life, and the way to start with a great life is to start with a great attitude. Your life matters, and you shouldn't feel ashamed. You are a beautiful, amazing person, and absolutely DESERVE to live and spread your awesomeness!
P.S: Your poetry is amazing, by the way!