When you buy your waifu a present

You bought your waifu an AR-15?
I bought my waifu a deathray.

That's way better. But nozomi really barely needs the AR. It's just for backup. She knows I'll take care of her.
As for the deathray: I'm jealous! I need a deathray for killing anti-anime penguins!

Alright then.
As unofficial weapons provider of the anime army, I will from now on supply them with deathrays and other dangerous and powerful equipment.

They're gonna use those death rays in a totally unsafe manner! Thanks!

This is the warfront!
Safety is no more!
*Goatfire pulls out a flamethrower that looks like a goat skull.*
DIE, PENGUIN SCUM!!!

Kill em all.

Yes boss.
*You can hear penguins screaming and fire roaring. The fire might also be laughing.*

Holy shit! Goatfire lives up to his name killing 1200 penguins in one day and somehow not running out of flamethrower fuel...

Well of course I don't run out of fuel, this is powered by my own infernal magics.

You're basically unstoppable unless the Penguins get their ice cannon.... wait I've said too much...

The penguins has succumbed! Killed by a flame thrower, Armed Skuas their predators and destroyed by hellfire

Ice cannot extinguish hellfire, SurlyKong.
They will soon learn that.

Four hours later...

Those penguins are in for a bad time then.

*An electric guitar solo starts playing as the battlefield is engulfed in hellfire.*

We need to add weapons on them like metal talons and laser beam to cook their prey!

Yes sir.
RESEARCH TEAM!
MAKE THESE INTO ATTACK BIRDS!

Those penguins will be lunch for them hehehe!

I gave my waifu this. I guarantee it will protect her because it releases sonic waves to its target

That will be great. Until it starts eating all the neighborhood cats...

It doesn't tho. But he loads a destructive sonic wave

What does it eat?

It anything he kills. His teeth are under his belly

He'll take care of the rat problem then...

He can kill rats around him in 1 sonic blast

Tell him to get busy. The streets are full of pesky rats.

Houndeye sound https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SECNGjngzDk