Never underestimate a resourceful idiot

I swear people only want you to tell them what to do anymore without any independent though required on their part...

To produce better instructions for today's quality idiots, a mentor once told me to consider writing a dialog about how to brush teeth. It goes something like this:

Me: put toothpaste on the toothbrush, and then...
Mentor: *interrupts* where do I get toothpaste?
Me: at the drug store...
Mentor: how do I get there?
Me: take a taxi...
Mentor: what kind do I buy?
Me: Colgate I guess...
Mentor: How much will it cost, should I use cash or card because I left my cash at home
Me: Use your card then...
Mentor: how about the toothbrush?
.
15 minutes later...
.
Mentor: Ok, so I'm back home in the upstairs bathroom standing in front of the sink holding my toothbrush in the right hand and toothpaste in the left hand, what part of the toothbrush do I put toothpaste on?
Me: the bristles...
Mentor: how much do I put?
Me: something about pea-sized...
Mentor: how do I get it out of the tube?
Me: unscrew the cap.
Mentor: But it's a flip-top, I can't unscrew it!
Me: Ok, I get your point now, can we stop this please?

Ever since then I have forced myself to write out instructions like this, detailing the things that most people would take for granted and are just assumed to be known by everyone as a basic skill. Don't EVER assume someone trying to use your product or follow your instructions will know how to do anything. Yes, this is the point that we have come to ladies and gentlemen.

One shift told me that they used my step by step guide I wrote for setting up and using one of our meters while I was taking a couple of days off and it worked great for them. Only issue they had is that they had to go to my lab to get my copy because they couldn't find it on the network.

When they got done telling me this I reached over to their desk and retrieved the guide that I had printed off and placed in a nice binder. It had been sitting on their desk for about a year now. Clearly labeled on the spine as well as the cover as to what the guide was. It was fun watching them squirm.

Gotta love it...I gave a presentation to some folks today, some asked questions about the same subject I covered in it after the fact...guess who got to call them out for not listening...tsk tsk...