Fire Truck On Fire - Irony

Just pointing out a very common irony I see a lot. When are parents complicit & when are they not? I think it might depend on some variables like most things, but even neglect is a form of abuse so not knowing your kid is screwing up bad isn't much of an excuse. Not as bad as a parent openly abusing their kid, but still a connection to said actions. Some kids are seemingly bad from day one no matter what the parent tries too, so it is complicated. But it bugs me to see parents wear the success of their kids as their own & ignore any failed attempts, usually in the older siblings.

I totally agree with you. There was a kid who shot up my former high school and it was another one of those cases where the dad had no idea that the kid had taken his gun to school. And when you really get into the story it was a case where it was just the kid and the dad, the dad was never around and when be was paid little attention to him. Just a couple hours a day could have been all that was needed to turn this kid down another path. Now, I'm not saying that there wasn't something seriously different in this kid's head and he wouldn't have done it anyway or that the circumstances that he was facing was any excuse to kikl two people. However, there could have been a chance to catch some of the warning signs.
With my kids, of course I celebrate their successes. I also want them to be proud of themselves and own their achievements. Same thing with their failures; I want them to own their failures just the same and use them as learning opportunities.
I tell them all the time that I don't care if they fail at something. I'd rather see them try and fail than to not try at all.
Sorry to get long winded, I hope I stuck more or less to the topic