I figured you would find out. Far out in space, in another universe resides the Salads, a species of cheery mustached salesmen. They had a rather infamous reputation for ripping off the most powerful in the cosmos. At the time, the ruler of the universe was Moofert the Sexy. He was the latest victim of the Salads antics, and was furious like nobody had ever seen before. Cornered, the Salads opened a portal to the planet most similar to their own, Earth. They knew they could not stay, for Moofert would use his sexiness to evaporate the Earth. Not wanting to be responsible for humanity's destruction, the Salads quickly taught the Earthlings their secrets and customs before bailing to the Scorble of Assbutt. We now carry on their tradition with fake discounts and shameless cash-ins galore.