Spidermoderator: No Hope imagine

WILL YOU EVER F**KING STOP
JESUS

What is even going on?

Somebody banned me for "spam". Ask Spire.

IT WAS PISSING PEOPLE OFF

I mean, to be fair, this template is being spammed but you don’t deserve a ban over it. At least not an indefinite one, I would say like a two hour posting ban would be a sufficient punishment if you were to get anything more than a warning.

It seems you have contracted the new variant

Known as the “annoying dumbass” variant

YOU ALL F**KING SUCK, DO YOU THINK YOU ARE FUNNY BY NOT WORKING AND DESTROYING THE AMERICAN ECONOMY THAT MY GENERATION WORKED OUR ASSES OFF TO BUILD? NO ITS NOT F**KING FUNNY, YOU HAVE ZERO RESPECT FOR AUTHORITY LOOK IN THE GO***AMNED MIRROR YOU ARE LOSERS YOU WILL CONTRIBUTE TO THE DOWNFALL OF THIS ONCE GREAT NATION, I HOPE YOU ARE HAPPY WHEN YOU ARE ALL SPEAKING MANDARIN AND WORSHIPPING AN 87 YEAR OLD XI JINPING

I am going to have sex with Shelob from Lord of the Rings. I find Shelob in Middle-earth: Shadow of War extremely sexy. However, her body is made up of 87% poison, and 100% poison surrounds her. That could kill me if I tried to have sex with her. To remedy this, Shelob casts a spell on me making me resistant to poison. Keep in mind, resistant is not the same as immune. I still take damage. It is either 1 point or 0 points of damage each second I am having sex with her. Just because a particular second caused 0 points of damage, does not mean I did not feel anything, it just means I took no damage. I am not going to rush through having sex with Shelob. I make sure I pleasure everything I have sex with - especially non-humans! I’d rather take damage than not pleasure Shelob.

Shelob and I go to Cirith Ungol to have sex. When having sex with non-humans, it is ALWAYS sexier to have sex in their natural habitat rather than a human’s natural habitat. Cirith Ungol is Shelob’s natural habitat.

Before we went to Cirith Ungol, Shelob let all the Nazgûl know that we are just here for sex. The Nazgûl will not attack us because they know that I am here in Cirith Ungol on sexual business. This includes the Black Captains. However, the Witch-king of Angmar thinks that I am going to be an easy recruit for becoming a Nazgûl considering I am having sex with Shelob. However, I have no interest in becoming a Nazgûl.