Control! Control, do you read? This is Church from Blood Gulch Outpost Alpha, over. If you're getting this it's an emergency! You've gotta send a plumber as soon as you get this, please! Tucker and Caboose—eugh—they flushed a damn grenade down the shitter and it exploded! And it's everywhere, Control! It's coming out of the go***amn walls for Pete's sake. Send help please. We need—I need—a plumber. F**k! And some god-damn new recruits too, because I'm about to murder these two! Church out.
