Magic 8 ball

12. Goobert

A small white cat strolls in with a lollipop.

Goobert: “:3”

He signs “Goobert :3” and pats the registrar’s hand.

Registrar: “…Thank you. That was surprisingly normal.”

Goobert leaves a small hair on the sheet. For decoration.

goob

2. Parcelboy

A pile of boxes waddles in. One of them speaks.

Parcelboy: “HI I’M HERE TO SIGN UP BUT I FORGOT MY NAME— oh wait. No I didn’t. I’m Parcelboy.”

They drop a package onto the counter. It lands with a metallic CLUNK.

Registrar: “…What’s inside?”

Parcelboy: “Uhhh… probably something deadly. Or like, a toaster. My parcels are basically lootboxes but worse. Wanna open it?”

Registrar: “Absolutely not.”

Parcelboy scribbles their name using a pen held in a cardboard flap.

As they leave, three more parcels fall out of them and explode into confetti for no reason.

28. The Clock

A clock in a tuxedo walks (?) forward.

Tick.
Tick.
Tick.

It raises one hand slowly…
And stamps the page with a pre-prepared “✔”.

Then it leaves.

It never spoke.
It never had to.

27. Mr AntTenna

Static bursts from thin air as a tall TV-headed showman appears.

Mr AntTenna: “HELLLOOOO AUDIENCE!! YOUR FAVORITE HOST IS HERE TO COMPETE!! LET’S MAKE THIS SEASON UNFORGETTABLE!”

He enlarges to 10 feet tall, grabs a comically giant pen, and signs.

Mr AntTenna: “DON’T CHANGE THAT CHANNEL!”

He pixelates out of existence.

26. Grimm

The tent darkens.
Fire dances at the entrance.

Grimm: “Ah… a stage on which to perform.”

He signs with a flaming flourish.

Grimm: “May the Games be entertaining.”

His cloak swirls; the fire vanishes.

25. Meowl

A tiny owl-cat hybrid glides in.

Meowl: “Hello! I’m new here!”

Registrar: “Welcome! Please sign here.”

She signs with the cutest handwriting imaginable and hoots proudly.

24. Wembry

A seven-foot-tall turquoise figure enters, immediately bumps into the doorframe, and turns bright pink with embarrassment.

Registrar: “It’s okay! Just— just a form!”

Wembry: “yeh— okay— um— s-s-sorry—”

She signs extremely carefully, sticking her tongue out in concentration.

She leaves, tripping over nothing.

23. Sector

A glass alien walks in.
Then turns into a glass pencil.
Then a glass chair.
Then back to normal.

Sector: “SEK-TOR SIGN. UP.”

Registrar: “Sure. Right here.”

Sector signs by turning their hand into a glass pen.

They leave while turning into a glass duck.

22. Oliver

Oliver bursts in like he’s late for literally everything.

Oliver: “HEY Cassie did you sign? Oh good. I’m signing too— hi— sorry— excuse me— where’s the pen?”

He talks the entire time he’s writing.

Oliver: “Do you guys do like, snacks? Or souvenirs? Cassie we should get matching merch—”

He leaves still talking.

21. CassiLyn

A half-demon, half-angel girl wanders in looking half-awake.

Cassie: “Ughhh do I have to write the whole name? Can I, like… ritual-sign it?”

Registrar: “No magic on the forms please.”

She sighs, flicks her hair, and writes CassiLyn in perfectly loopy pink letters.

Cassie: “Okay I’m going back to sitting down now.”

20. Springtrap

The lights flicker.
A faint, metallic creaking echoes.

Springtrap steps out of the shadows.

Springtrap: “I wish to… participate.”

The registrar swallows.

Registrar: “O-okay— name?”

Springtrap: “Springtrap will suffice.”

He signs using a claw and a disturbingly elegant handwriting.

Children laugh faintly in the distance. The registrar pretends not to hear.

19. Pablo

He floats in like a JPEG.

Pablo: “Pablo.”

Registrar: “…Anything else?”

Pablo: “Pablo.”

He signs “Pablo.”
He leaves.
Maybe he was never really there.

18. Buster Keaton

He silently steps inside, stone-faced, hat perfectly centered.

He takes the sheet.
He signs with calm precision.
He nods once.

A sandbag falls from nowhere behind him; he sidesteps without looking.

Everyone applauds.

YAY

17. Yujiro Hanma

The tent walls tremble.

Yujiro walks in with a smile that says he could break the planet in half for fun.

Yujiro: “Point me to the sign-up sheet.”

He doesn’t use the pen.
He presses his finger to the paper and the paper writes his name in fear.

Registrar: “…Okay.”

As he leaves, someone outside unwraps an apple fritter.
Yujiro’s demon back activates like a nuke.

He sprints off hunting the pastry.

16. Sasha

A pink cat with huge ears strolls in strumming a guitar riff.

Sasha: “Heyyyy. Signing up. You guys got snacks?”

Registrar: “Everyone keeps asking that. No.”

Sasha: “Bummer.”

He signs and plays a little riff of victory before exiting.

15. Spunch Bob

He walks in exactly like SpongeBob: a little hop and a very bright smile.

Spunch Bob: “I’m ready! I’m ready! I’m ready!”

He signs with a crayon he brought himself.

Then he skips out.

14. Divide

A one-foot-tall creature stomps in, vibrating with enough energy to kill a man.

Divide: “HI HI HI HELLO I’M HERE I’M SIGNING UP— DO YOU HAVE ANY GEMS? CAN I CUT THIS PAPER IN HALF?”

Registrar: “NO— please— just write your name— DON'T cut anything—”

Divide signs with incredible speed, his division-shaped gem glowing lightly.

Divide: “OKAY THANK YOU BYE LOVE YOU MAYBE I DON’T KNOW I’M PANICKING—”

He leaves at sonic speed.

13. Lazarus Ravenbriar

Lazarus walks in beating a complicated rhythm on a pair of drumsticks he brought for no reason.

Lazarus: “Hey. I’m here to sign up I guess.”

He signs neatly, pushes his glasses up, and leaves without further comment.

The registrar appreciates the calm.

11. Ryomen Sukuna

A sinister, overwhelming presence fills the room.

Sukuna grins through Yuji’s face.

Sukuna: “You dare ask me to sign? Fine. It’ll be the last thing you ever demand of me.”

Registrar: “…okay.”

He carves his name onto the paper with a cursed slash that somehow doesn’t destroy the table.

Sukuna: “Tell the others they’re already dead.”

He leaves, amused at his own drama.

10. Zap

Zap slides in like someone whose Wi-Fi is lagging in real life.

Zap: “Heeeyyy what's up babe—”

Registrar: “I’m not— we’re not— just sign please.”

Zap: “Yeah yeah, bet.”
He flicks his shard-like fingers across the page, signing in a way that looks weirdly smug.

Zap: “If you see any cute girls signing up later tell ’em I’m single.”

He immediately trips on the exit flap.

9. The Stranger

A stick figure in a beret strolls in with the confidence of a man who owns the tent.

Stranger: “Greetings, peasants! The star of this season has arrived!”

Registrar: “Sir you haven’t even—”

Stranger (perfectly mimicking the registrar’s voice): “Sir you haven’t even—”

The registrar stares.

Stranger: “Don’t worry. You’ll get used to my magnificence.”
He signs with exaggerated flair.
Then strikes a pose.

Stranger: “Do you have corn dogs? For post-signature nourishment?”

They do not.

He leaves disappointed.

8. Skrunkly

A blur enters. It might be a creature. It might be frantic energy made visible.

Skrunkly: “HIHIHIHI I’M SIGNING UP— OH A PEN— OH A TABLE— OH A GUY— WHAT’S YOUR NAME— CAN I BITE THE FORM— CAN I BITE YOU?”

Registrar: “No— no biting— just sign— PLEASE JUST SIGN.”

She signs in a perfect, adorable cursive script.

Skrunkly: “Okay bye!!”

She ricochets off a wall and leaves.

Yay

7. Samuel Hatman

A humanoid spider crawls down from ABOVE the tent, causing the registrar to scream.

Samuel sighs irritably.

Samuel: “Bro relax, I’m here to sign up.”

Registrar: “Why did you come from the ceiling?!”

Samuel: “Because the door is too crowded and also walking is annoying.”

He signs with eight hands at once. It looks awful.

6. Scampton The Great

A burst of blue confetti erupts as Scampton cartwheels inside, yelling:

Scampton: “HELL-O [Player Two]! I’M HERE TO ENTER THE [DETERMINATION DOODLE DERBY]!!!”

Registrar: “The… the what?”

Scampton: “THE HUNGER GAMES, BABY!! HIT ME WITH THAT SIGN-UP SHEET!!”

He fires a Pipis into the air like a firework. It splats on the ceiling.

He fills his name in ALL CAPS.
Even the part that didn’t need to be.

Scampton: “SEE YOU ON THE [MULTIPLAYER BATTLEFIELD]!! OR IN JAIL!!! EITHER WAY I’M WINNING!!!”

He dashes out, leaving a trail of jester bells and crime.

5. Spy

Spy casually appears behind the registrar without ever entering through the front.

Spy: “Bonjour. I would like to sign up. And also, I would like you to forget I was ever behind you.”

Registrar: “Please stop appearing behind people.”

Spy: “Non.”

He signs with a pen that somehow isn’t his — the registrar later realizes it was theirs.

Spy: “I look forward to disappointing all of you.”

He vanishes mid-sentence.

4. Biowaffe-1917 (Felix Schmidt)

The temperature drops.
The tent quiets.
A soldier-shaped shadow enters.

Biowaffe-1917: Heavy breathing through fused gasmask “REGISTRATION… REQUESTED.”

The registrar freezes midway through reaching for a form.

Registrar: “O-of course— name?”

Biowaffe: “FELIX SCHMIDT… IS DEAD.”
He raises his blade-arm.
Biowaffe: “WRITE… BIOWAFFE-1917.”

He does not blink. Because he cannot.

After signing, he simply turns and glides away, cape swaying eerily.

The registrar checks their pulse.

3. Stormy

Stormy struts in like a cat who definitely knocked something over on the way here.

Stormy: “Sup. Where do I sign? Also if Dusty asks, I did not steal the flap of the tent. That was gravity.”

He twirls a legal, fully registered gun around his finger like it’s a toy.

Registrar: “…Sir, please don’t—”

Stormy: “Relax, I’m the safest man here. …Actually no I’m not. But I’m friendly!”
He beams, then signs very aggressively, like the paper personally offended him.

Stormy: “Cool. I’m gonna go climb something I’m definitely not supposed to.”

He backflips out of the tent.

🌟 HUNGER GAMES SIGN-UPS
Registration Tent – Day 1
1. Dusty Crophopper

Dusty doesn’t walk in — he swoops down from nowhere, landing with the smugness of someone who thinks they just created aviation.

He taps the sign-up sheet with one finger.

Dusty: “Make sure you write my name in big letters. Bold it. Maybe underline it. Everyone needs to know Dusty is in the race.”

Registrar: “Sir, this is… not a race.”

Dusty: “Everything’s a race if you believe in yourself.”
He winks, snaps his fingers, and a Minecraft Creaking materializes behind him with a horrible rrrhhhhhrrg.
Dusty doesn’t even look.

Dusty: “He’s my emotional support creature. Put him down as a plus-one.”

The registrar refuses. Dusty shrugs.

Dusty: “Their loss.”

He signs with a dramatic flourish and takes off straight through the tent flap, ripping it open on the way out.