Spongebob shows Patrick Garbage

THE PICTS AND THE SCOTS FIGHT OFF THE ROMANS, AND THEIR DESCENDANT, KENNETH I MACALPIN, UNIFIES THE COUNTRY AND FOUNDS THE ALPIN DYNASTY IN 843 AND CONSTANTINE II (WHO RULED FOR 43 YEARS BEFORE RETIRING AND LIVING INTO HIS 80S) DEFENDS FROM THE VIKINGS IN 900S WHILE ESTABLISHING A GAELIC SYSTEM OF MORMAER GOVERNMENT AND CHURCH WHILE OPERATING UNDER A SERIES OF ELECTION OF KINGS BASED ON THE OLDEST MALE RELATIVE, WHERE BROTHERS AND THEN COUSINS SUCCEED WHILE RETIRING OR FACE GETTING BOOBY-TRAPPED, ASSASSINATED, BURNED ALIVE, OR KILLED IN BATTLE OR BY A DUEL WITH EACH OTHER (THIS IS CALLED TANISTRY); AFTER WINNING A WAR BETWEEN COUSINS AND BROTHERS, KENNETH II REPLACES TANISTRY WITH PRIMOGENITURE, SO HIS RELATIVES BOOBY-TRAP A STATUE TO MURDER HIM, SO HIS SON MALCOLM II FIGHTS A DUEL AND A CIVIL WAR TO DEFEAT HIS COUSINS IN BATTLE, THEN CONSOLIDATES POWER AND MARRIES HIS DAUGHTERS TO PRODUCE GRANDSONS WHO WILL SUCCEED HIM, GIVING RISE TO A NEW DYNASTY RULED BY THE REAL MACBETH AND DUNCAN I, WHICH TAKES OVER AFTER THE ALPIN DYNASTY ENDS WITH MALCOLM'S DEATH IN 1034; SCOTLAND IS KNOWN ONLY AS A PLACE FOR ENGLAND TO CONQUER AND THE WARS OF INDEPENDENCE; MALCOLM III AVENGES HIS FATHER BY KILLING MACBETH IN BATTLE AND LATER MURDERS HIS STEPSON LULACH TO TAKE THE THRONE IN 1058, AFTER MARRYING INGEBORG FINNSDOTTIR, WIDOW OF THE EARL OF ORKNEY, HE HAS THREE SONS, INCLUDING THE FUTURE DUNCAN II, AFTER HER DEATH, HE AND HIS SECOND WIFE, HUNGARIAN-BORN ST. MARGARET, CHANGE THE GAELIC CHURCH TO ANGLO-SAXON AND CATHOLIC CONVENTIONS ALONGSIDE PRODUCING EIGHT CHILDREN, AND MALCOLM'S SONS DEFEAT HIS BROTHER TO TAKE HOLD OF THE THRONE, WITH THE YOUNGEST DAVID I TRANSFORMING THE NATION INTO A FEUDAL NORMAN SOCIETY DURING THE DAVIDIAN REVOLUTION, LEADING TO SCOTLAND'S INFLUENCE OF KING DAVID I BEING A SAINT, THE WOOL TRADE, THE CATHOLIC CHURCH, JOHN DUNS SCOTUS, WHO GAVE US THE IMMACULATE CONCEPTION, THE ANNEXATION OF NORTHERN ENGLAND AND THE ISLANDS, THE UNIFICATION OF THE SCOTTISH PEOPLE, AND THE PROLONGING OF THE DUNKELD DYNASTY UNTIL 1290, WHEN MARGARET, 7-YEAR OLD GRANDDAUGHTER OF ALEXANDER III, DIES OF AN ILLNESS ON HER HOME, BEING THE ONLY SURVIVING DESCENDANT OF THE LATE KING; JAMES III FOLLOWS HIS FATHER JAMES II TO UNIFY THE ENTIRE SCOTLAND, THEN SUPPORTS EDWARD IV AND THE YORKISTS DURING THE WAR OF THE ROSES, AND HIS AUTOCRACY TEMPTED HIS BROTHER ALEXANDER TO UNSUCCESSFULLY OVERTHROW HIM TWICE WITH RICHARD BROTHER OF EDWARD IV, HEREAFTER LEADING TO THE SCOTTISH RENAISSANCE AND HIS ELDEST SON, JAMES, TO OVERTHROW HIM AND BECOME JAMES IV, WHO PROLONGED THE SCOTTISH RENAISSANCE WHILE EXPANDING THE ARMY, NAVY, AND GOVERNMENT TO ALL AREAS OF THE NATION, WHILE SCOTLAND EXPERIENCES A MASSIVE CULTURAL GROWTH AND THE UNIVERSITIES OF MEDICAL ABERDEEN AND OF SURGERY, AS WELL AS THE PRINTING PRESS, ALLOWING SCOTLAND TO FLOURISH, AND JAMES MARRIED MARGARET, SISTER OF HENRY VIII, BUT HER BROTHER TEMPTED JAMES BY INVADING FRANCE, LEADING TO JAMES BEING KILLED AT THE BATTLE OF FLODDEN IN ENGLAND AT 1513, THE LAST DEATH OF A BRITISH MONARCH IN BATTLE, NOT RICHARD III; AFTER JOHN BALLIOL OF THE HOUSE OF BALLIOL, A FORMER PUPPET KING OF THE ENGLISH, EXILES HIMSELF AFTER ESTABLISHING AN ALL-MATTERS COALITION TO FRANCE KNOWN AS THE AULD ALLIANCE, ROBERT I THE BRUCE SUCCEEDS HIM, ESTABLISHING THE HOUSE OF BRUCE IN 1306, AND DEFEATS THE ENGLISH AT THE BATTLE OF BANNOCKBURN IN 1314, AND SIGNS THE DECLARATION OF ARBROATH IN THE 1328 TO AFFIRM SCOTLAND AS AN INDEPENDENT NATION THAT IS NOW, FOR THE FIRST TIME, ON PAR WITH THE OTHER MAJOR EUROPEAN POWERS, LEADING TO HIS SON, DAVID II, TO COMPETE WITH JOHN BALLIOL'S SON EDWARD AS KING TO AID FRANCE DURING THE HUNDRED YEARS WAR WITH MIXED SUCCESS ON THE SCOTTISH SIDE OVERALL, AND EVEN AFTER DAVID DIES IN 1371, HIS NEPHEW AND CO-RULER BECOMES ROBERT II, EVEN THOUGH HE WAS OLDER THAN DAVID, LEADING TO A NEW DYNASTY TAKING OVER THE WHOLE OF SCOTLAND, WITH THE LATTER'S GRANDSON JAMES I AIDING FRANCE DURING THE HUNDRED YEARS WAR AND THE CREATION OF THE UNIVERSITY OF ST ANDREWS AFTER BEING CAPTURED BY ENGLISH PIRATES AS A YOUNG BOY, HIS SON JAMES II SIEGING CASTLES, UPGRADING THE MILITARY, HERE THE WHILE INTRODUCING GOLF AND A NEW PARLIAMENTARY SYSTEM WHILE FRANCE WINS THE WAR THANKS TO SCOTLAND'S SUCCESSES; SCOTLAND, ITS HISTORY, AND ITS INFLUENCES ARE ALL STILL RELEVANT TO THIS DAY IN MATTERS OF SCIENCE, PHILOSOPHY, RELIGION, SOCIOLOGY, EXPLORATION OF AFRICA AND OTHER AREAS UNDER DAVID LIVINGSTONE, CULTURE, AND THE ENVIRONMENT, AS WELL AS ITS INFLUENCES ON NATIONS LIKE ARGENTINA AND RUSSIA; AND EVEN THOUGH MOST PEOPLE MAY KNOW ONLY A HANDFUL OF SCOTTISH PEOPLE, PARTICULARLY THE MONARCHS, THERE ARE RULERS WHO GOT INVOLVED IN BOOBY TRAPS, ASSASSINATED, BURNED ALIVE, KILLED IN DUELS OR THE THRONE, DEPOSED, REIGNED FOR DECADES, AND/OR LIVED INTO OLD AGE, PLUS MANY GUERRILLA WARRIORS AND KNIGHTS LIKE ANDREW DE MORAY, WRITERS, SCIENTISTS, THINKERS, CLERGYMEN, AND SAINTS, AND THOUGH THE SAME IS FOR MUCH OF SCOTLAND'S HISTORY,