i wanna stretch my shi like mr fantastic

control over every probibility
allows for flight, teleportation, mind control, making fajitas materialize out of nothing, and other stuff, just because i said theres a 100% chance of that event happening

boring power

100% chance of your genitalia exploding

yeah but like life would be so damn boring man

100% chance of life not being boring

The ability to make people who think they're safe behind the screen have a ficking heart attack

This is only useful if you’re like chronically online

Sometimes I'll come online for like twenty minutes and I'm sick of someone after seeing just one post from them

Medical expertise and sarcasm

telekinesis

teleporting