Bro, let me tell you. I was just minding my own business, doing absolutely NOTHING suspicious, just casually vibing in the realm of existence, and then BAM—I Dieded.
No warning, no final boss battle, no dramatic anime outro music—just pure, unfiltered EXPIRATION. My soul yeeted itself out of my body like a defective Windows update, and my entire consciousness crash-landed in the void faster than a toddler face-planting on a trampoline.
Doctors tried to tell me it was "medically impossible" to be typing this right now, but jokes on them—ghost Wi-Fi is STRONGER than any earthly connection. My spectral fingers are speed-typing at Mach 12 and this message is LITERALLY ECHOING through the fabric of time itself.
So yeah, if anyone needs me, I’ll be haunting the nearest Taco Bell, because death may have taken me… but it will NEVER take away my right to questionable late-night burritos.
