why it doesn't suck to be born as a meme guardian (mostly) [sort the comments by oldest first]

It all begins one fateful day when your mom, who is pregnant with you, walks home from her weekend 5 hours of shopping. She shoots dirty looks at any nearby humanoids or nonhumans. Why? Because that's just the way she is. Her husband is like that too unfortunately. Anyway, while she is on her way home, a USB begins to fall towards the earth. It hits her in the back of the neck, surprisingly not killing her, just causing her a minor annoyance. You are blissfully unaware of what has just happened to you.

a few months later, you are finally born. Congratulations, you have officially taken the first step into this cruel, unforgiving world full of idiots cuz its smg4 yo! Right from the start, they all knew you were no ordinary child. You could stand at birth. Additionally, you could walk and eat solid food at 8 months and speak fluently at 1.5 years. Your cousin, who you only hung out with at daycare, was able to do the same stuff, as he is able to use your powers. it doesnt harm you, it just makes him stronger.

lore lore lore

since you are capable of doing all these things for yourself at such a young age, your parents take advantage of you by making you do stuff for them. you dont mind, as you do everything out of the kindness and goodwill from your heart. a few years later, you and your cousin enter kindergarten, where you meet some of the closest friends you will ever make: a hedgehog, a fox with an extra tail (however they are most certainly not the ones you may know), a guinealeon, and a jacknet.

one day, your friends and cousin are not there. they are most likely sick or have plans or whatever. you try to play with the other kids, but they dont want anything to do with you. it doesnt matter, as you sometimes like playing on your own with your imagination. as you are minding your own business, a strange, dark bug begins to run toward you, but you dont notice it. what you do notice is a strange lady who lacks a neck, her head just floats. she unintentionally steps on the bug and approaches you from the other side of the fence which prevents some of your classmates from escaping. little do you know that she will become a very important part of your life.

you both introduce yourselves to each other, and she says that she senses great things within you. at first you dont really know what this means, so you meet up with her after school, where she gives you your first aura lesson. you learn how to flare up your power and um, use it. of course your cousin gains these abilities too and your friends give you pointers and methods on it, usually when it comes to running super fast. unfortunately, there are some nefarious folks out there who also know what you are capable of. like everyone else, they just want your power for whatever they want it for.

over the years, you get stronger, smarter, and have plenty of run-ins with the thugs. on the flipside, you also have some great adventures and heartfelt moments of friendship. however, once you reach your last year of elementary, you have to put up with this green-faced idiot who looks familiar to some viewers. he always starts it all because you simply are not like that at all. but one day, you decide enough is enough and tell him to meet you at the huge local stunttrack, where you will both face off in a duel of aura and speed. of course, he fails miserably, which causes him to realize that he should not have done the things he did. you forgive him and befriend him. (his siblings also went along with it).

You get through middle school along with your cousin and friends. you all talked to some guy who was rather strange, but was really good at art. one day he vandalized the school to show everyone that he was not what they thought he was. of course, this gets him expelled. not only that, you all never see him again (for a very long time). you all assume his parents got too angry with him over it. once you all enter high school and graduate early, you and your cousin's lives change forever.

now its down to just you and your cousin. you both have no idea about the fates of your friends, and they have no idea about the fates of both of you. you go to your aura tutor for help, and she tells you to just follow your spirit. you decide to take heed to what she said, so you and your cousin go to a strange dojo ran by a meme guardian who looks rather familiar. he gives you unique weapons, as you are the only one who fit them. and one of your classmates, an annoying but kind little duck, decides he wants to tag along with you and your cousin. you both have no idea about the role he will play in your lives.

after all that, your meme guardian master who looks an awful lot like that stupid one-toothed snowman assigns you and your class to infiltrate hogwarts. (he really hates magic). while you all are there, your new duck friend gains the ability to change forme after falling into a cauldron. nothing really happens to your cousin and you get into a scuffle with a hypogriff, which is where you got your helmet feather from. you also gain your fangs in a fight with the teacher's pet, who number 3ed himself after he saw your great power.

After infiltrating the Hogwarts School of Wizardry and Witchcraft, it's time for you all to go home and watch movies or play video games or whatever it is that you do after a long hard day doing something. However you decide not to go home; you remember what your parents were like and you decide the only family you have is your cousin. you decide that you will find your place in the world with him and your aura tutor. however it does not play out the way you hoped it would.