Seriously, I feel like sh*t

A German walks into a bar and asks for a martini. The bartender asks, "Dry?". The German replies, "Nein, just one."

I told my wife to hug her problems away

She went over to hug me

You ever hear about the king who was 12 inches tall?

He was a great ruler.

I'd tell you a prune joke, but it was dated.

What do you call a well balanced horse?

Stable.

A pun, a play, and a limerick walk into a bar.

No joke.

I was wondering why my Frisbee kept getting bigger.

Then it hit me.