story I made for neat, hope you enjoy

:O

Huh
Neat

Yeah?

*ring, ring ring*
Venus looked towards the door saying “hello welcome to the cafe”. The customer made his way over to the counter to order “do I know you?” Venus asked, “yeah” he said “it’s zevver, I come here for coffee whenever I’m nearby”. “Yeah I remember you” Venus said “but…why’d you come here so close to closing time?” She asked. “Well uh my uhhhh…..friend spark said you had an a book I could read, and I read it and thought I could help you with somthi—“ “I’m sorry but I don’t really think I can trust you right now” Venus interrupted, “ there was a ummm….issue recently with someone who I trusted to much, and that lead to some of my real friends dying…..I….don’t really want this to happen again”
She said “oh…..I don’t really know how to respond to that, I don’t mean any harm I just….wanted to help with your uhhh” zevvers voice got quite “Aphrodite problem…..”. “How do you know that?!” Venus asked “I read your book ” zevver said “I can definitely figure out a solution, and trust me I won’t hurt you anymore than a doctors appointment” “Are you sure?” Venus asked “yeah” zevver said “trust me on this”

Venus started turning off the cafe appliances and putting away the ingredients. She turned to zevver “so how exactly are you gonna get rid of Aphrodite for me?” She asked. “Simple, I just need some of your dna, and enough cells to make a new body” zevver said. Venus walked out from behind the counter, over to zevver “but how are you going to get Aphrodite out?” She asked “can you like, wake her up so she can talk?” Zevver asked. “I mean I uh can but last time Aphrodite was with people….it wasn’t the greatest experience” she paused “it’s a little uncomfortable having to be with a love obsessed goddess all the time” Venus said. “Venus do not worry I’m gay as f**k I’m not gonna get banged by a pink ghost” zevver said. Venus stepped to the middle of the room “well….here goes” she said as her hair started to glow pink

"hello~' a voice said, sounding similar yet distinct to venus'. "yeah, whatever look I'm here to see if I can help you with something" zevver said to Aphrodite "oh sure~, I have something in min-" she was interrupted " yeah I know exactly where this is going so shut your horny ass up and listen" zevver said "rude, but fiiiiine I will listen to you" said Aphrodite 'ok good, so you know how the person who's body your in doesn't really like you right?" zevver asked " i mean yeah, i dont get why though shes literally designed after me" "wait" zevver interrupted her "you made a body to house your soul, and put another soul in it.....that doesnt like you...when you could have just made it empty" "oh....i didnt think of that" aphrodite said "so thats why im here to get you a separate body" "fiiine, as long as i get to pick how it looks' she said "yeah you can" zevver replied "ok tell me when you need me again, and it BETTER be for something interesting~" venus' hair regained its blue color "so howd it go?' she asked "good, i didnt get touched by an ancient god" zevver said

Venus walked into a forest park not that far from her cafe, she was told to bring a bag of spare clothes. Venus thought to herself if she really needed to do this, she heard a voice in her head saying “Venus you and I have been getting along fine, I know we had our issues but I leave you alone a lot now” Venus heard the voice from her other self and realized that they weren’t really two different people, more like two different halves, incomplete if separated. Venus’ thoughts were interrupted by a shout “hey venus, over here” it was zevver, he had a skeleton growing off his arm, most likely the body for Aphrodite she thought “zevver?” “Yeah” he replied to her “me and Aphrodite don’t really want this” she said “oh, well guess I fought a bobcat in the woods for nothing, it’s fine though I get why you wouldn’t want this” he said, turning around, with a very obvious clawed up area on the back of his coat. “Zevver!” Venus yelled “yeah?” He replied “your coat-“ she was interrupted “F**K!, THAT COAT WAS CUSTOM….guess I gotta get money for repairs, anyways I’ll see you later…..maybe” he said as he walked off, leaving Venus with a sense of acceptance to her other half

Written by me reviewed by neat

Cool story ig
But Aphrodite isn’t just some quirky half of her she’s r*ped people and probably ruined some peoples mental health, probably put Venus on the sex offenders registry for a while, while venus is a sweet person who runs a cafe and cares for her family.
Saying they’re the same person but fractured feels very wrong considering the situation

Ok but neat reviewed my writing blame him

No, it’s your writing

Yeah but he didn’t tell me to change it

I can critique both of you then
But mostly you
Because you wrote it