Pov: these two mysterious people in an alleyway

Aiden: *watching The Cuphead Show*

Vice: -_-

Lapis: does give out a charm for you *forms like a tube that connects to the bag* smile for the… tube idk *shoots out boiling balls of ink to Vice*

Vice: *creates a shield of black and red energy*

Lapis: *sucks up all the ink balls then tries to rip the shield* maybe you can help if you’re sitting here because idk what energy this mate has

Hat: way ahead of you pal

*a whole military force appears next to Hat*

Hat: our target is the energetic guy, not the inky guy!

Vice; *changes the energy to surround him*

Lapis: *keeps trying to rip apart the shield*

Vice; hmmm *changes it to form around lapis*

Lapis: huh challenge ey? *forms into a f**king 150 tornado*

Vice: stay inside the ball

Lapis: *digs underneath then came back to the surface* too easy

Vice: we're not siblings

Vi: No..no he's not

His incompetent ass DROPPED IT IN THE VENT

Aiden: now there he goes, I’ll get it

Vi: why do you care

Aiden: idk you had it *goes after it*

Vice: idiot

Let's go

Aiden: *thinks “idiot? Dumb bitch”*

On my way lads

*they both leave as quick as they could*

Aiden: dumb bitch they say *grabs the orb and puts it on the magician hat*

*he lied about dropping the orb*

Aiden: I yer dick-eds *uses MHat to jumpscare both Vice and Vi*

Vice: My bad

Aiden: *walks off*

Vice; hm?

Aiden: *still walking watching Cuphead*
Phone: Your soul is mine!

Vice: he really does not care

Aiden: *stops… continues walking*

Vice: hmmm

Vi; ready for the heist?

Vice: oh ..yeah

Aiden: *looks around*

Vice: let's go

Aiden: *notices them*

???: *mind: how's he watching a show on the streets*

Aiden: *on phone*

???: *mind: oh, that's how*

Phone: IIIIIIIIII AIN’T TOO WORRIED ABOUT IT!!

???: *mind: what?*

Phone: you had that nightmare again?

???: I should probably mind my own business

Phone: oh it’s nothing, the devil must have a big operation around

???: the devil?

??: Mind your own business Vice

Phone: he’s not worried about lil ol me hehe….

Vice: *grabs lapis by the throat*

Lapis: *head pops off* you dick-ed *uppercuts Vice* Oi Vi! *a blob of ink with its voicebox jumps down to Vi*

Vice: bleh

Vi: huh?

VB Lapis: what emotional breakdown can you do to this guy

Lapis: *holds then shakes Vice*

Vi: I think I might know if you guys can get him distracted

Aiden: yep

Hat: indubitably I wi- *gets picked up by

Aiden: *aims at Vice and shoots out a ladder*

VB Lapis: *returns to its formal spot*

Vice: a ladder-

*the ladder hits Vice in the face*
Lapis: *throws Vice to the floor then checks from the healing ink* ah yes it’s all fixed to normal

Vi: *flies up and drags vice to the ground*

Aiden: do it Hat
Hat: *shoots out bombs to Vice*

Vi: you think we'll be able to do this one?

Vice: hell yeah

Aiden: *notices them*

Vice: c'mon the capital has the orb

Aiden: *quickly follows them*

Vi: and that means paradise

Aiden: *puts on a magician hat* it’s time to cast a little spell

Vice: wrong!

It's salvation not paradise

Aiden: well I guess It’s a good setup, probably secretly

Vi: uh- ... Shut up

Vice: c'mon we're almost there

Aiden: I must keep the magical energy for later *takes it off and follows*

Vi: *points up at Vice destroying the city*

Lapis: *runs like an inkling on ink*

Vi: *gets up and flies with them*

Aiden: *picks up hat and follows Vi* do you feel any better?

Hat: yep, LETS RIIIIIDE!!!!

Aiden: *tries to catch up with Vi*

Vi: So we've got to find a way to knock him out or give him an emotional outburst big enough to separate his mind from the orb

Lapis: the p**is is the weak spot, that’s every man’s weakness *makes a hot boiling ball of ink and throws it at Vice’s P**is*

Vice: the f**k?

Lapis: what

Aiden: *catches up to Lapis while holding Hat*

Hat: what’s your deal?

Vice: I've gotten my conciseness back and now I'll punish humanity for locking me in that orb

Hat: womp womp of wompington land! inky guy idk your name but do something to this bitchsterd

Lapis: bet *uses its own ink to rapidly grow to idk 50 feet*

Aiden: how do you get that much ink

Lapis: complicated

Vi: VICE DON'T LEAVE ME TI FACE THE SECURITY ALONG AGAIN

Hat: you ok?

Vi: yeah..

Hat: hold that game Aiden
Aiden: it just about started but ok *stops the game*
Hat: *looks at Vi for 15sec* imagine

Vi: huh?

Aiden: ignore that guy, he’s just compensating
Hat: how is that compensating?

Vi: what do you mean "imagine"?

Hat: nothing

Vi: whatever

Aiden: does she know 🙂

Vice: your Futile attempts mean nothing *he summons an energy blast and throws it at the military*

Lapis: *absorbs it* keep aiming whilst you can

Vice: *summons a ton more*

Lapis: *keeps absorbing the energy until he’s fully electrical*

Vice; *summons a giant energy blast*

Lapis: *prepares to catch it*

Vice: hmm *throws it down at the city*

Lapis: *stops the energy blast and brings it closer*

Vice: *it splits into a ton of different energy blasts and start destroying the city*

Lapis: *grabs and squeezes Vice* you f**ker shitting ass, I bet you were treated like the middle child!

News: the orb contains immense bleak energy

And if put in the wrong hands then we're f**ked

Aiden: ah shit, I was just gonna use it as display
*calls hat immediately*

*cuts through Hat*

Hat: *gets a call* oh I got a call give me a moment

*meanwhile*

Vice: Oh yeah this orb is gonna be useful alright

Hat: shit

Aiden: f**k, f**k, f**k, f**k, fuhuck. I need another guy, but I gotta go to the facility.

Vice: time to split it open

Aiden: *goes to the facility* P-TELL Now

Worker: wha- *giant burst of bleak energy in the distance*

Aiden: pretty important, if you a little guy with a hat here tell them to go there. So I’ll be just going in *enters the room*

*large explosions in the distance*

Hat: *screams to the facility then lands to the facility*

Vice: damn. This power is amazing

Hat: hey is Aiden here?

Vice: huh

(That’s not what I mean, I mean by talking to the worker)

{oh}

Worker: uh- uhh I don't know

Aiden: Hat over here!
Hat: oh right, I see you need someone to fix that issue. Get the millitary! *follows Aiden to the P-TELL*

Vi: hey umm I think he got possessed

*Aiden & Hat enters the P-Tell*
Aiden: alright hat you ready?
Hat: …
Aiden: you hadn’t got any sleep? Don’t worry I know the summer can be too hot. Well besides that, we still need a way to open up this place to dial up… another person

Vi: I'll try to stop him in the meanwhile

Aiden: it say here we need to hit this P-TELL in these red circles, do you have anything in there?
Hat: *shoots out a ladder*
Aiden: that can get it

Vice: -_-

Lapis: *slaps Vice*

Vice; A-

Aiden: bro got inked
Hat: L moment for him

Vice: *summons a energy ball as big as the city*

Lapis: *absorbs it and it’s now electrical*

*it f**king explodes*

*ink goes everywhere*
Lapis: you think I can just die like that

Vice; I will reduce you to atoms

Lapis: *reforms itself back to where it was* bet *makes a bag full with hot boiling balls of ink* unless you want to be poisoned, burnt, or even both.

Vice: yeah....no *straight up leaves*

Hat: *keeps pacing up*

Vi; this is the strangest shit I've ever seen

Hat: *brings out a juice and drinks* GAINING UP MAN *walks at a extremely fast running pace*

Vice; *had skedaddled away*

(Skedaddled? 💀💀)
Hat: nah I have enough *tracks down their house*

(LMFAO)

*House*

(SUCK A DICK RN!!!)

Hat: Jacking-Pottle

*house*

Hat: *finds house* ok it should be here

*the orb doesn't teleport*

Aiden: *up on roof* wait what *goes back to the orb*

*the security system aims at him again*

Aiden: *grabs the orb*

*everything fires at him and pulls him away from it*

Aiden: *uses magic everywhere trying to defend and attack*

*the power suddenly shuts off*

Aiden: *uses a TORCH 🇬🇧🇬🇧* there’s the orb *obtains it*

*someone grabs it before him*

Aiden: hey

Vi: *goes inside*

Aiden: whatever *kicks hat to the house* I’m outta here you deal with him *walks off*

Forcefield: *bounces the hat back*

Hat: Oi yea!

Vi: what do we do about them?

Hat: *reveals himself*

Vice: huh...

Hat: finally I got out of there

Vice: strange

Hat: wdym strange

*still forcefield*

Aiden: eh I can wait *pulls out phone* Bloons TD?
Hat: yep *shoots out a replica of Aiden’s phone*

Vice; *walks through the forcefield*

Aiden: hi there *still playing Bloons TD*

Vice: top of the morning to ya

Hat: oooh some Irish meeting, I like that

Vice; Yeah yeah

Hat: *turns to Aiden* wanna match?
Aiden: hell yeah *thinks “does he know we’re next to his house”*

Vi: *tirelessly runs over to them and stops to breathe*

Hat: *realises* what happened to her

Vice: you were in a sphere in the f**king sky how the hell did you do that

Lapis: *in a broad accent* with that stupid energy you use, that’s out right shitty back in my place. We just use indestructible materials as coating armour. *back to it’s regular accent* it’s simple!

Vice: •_•

Lapis: *makes an inky orb that’s like a vacuum idk* Yeah funny you are *actives the orb vacuum to suck up the bleak energy*

*it starts to distort the inky orb more and more*

Lapis: you wha?! *puts the deformed orb back to itself then punches Vice like that f**ker blue shell in MKWii specifically*

Vice: what...

Lapis: *goes to destroy the force surrounding the military*

Vice: hmmm

Military: thank you sir *aims fire at Vice*

Lapis: GET HIS ASS!

*the military shoots*

Vice: *reaches the top*

Aiden: *hides a track device on Vice when he least expects as fast as he can*

Vice: huh? What's this?

Eh probably some kinda thing that vi had, I'll leave it

Aiden: *brings out a tracking phone and tracks down Vice*

Vice: *slashes open a vent with a spikey black and red energy *

Aiden: *grabs out a magic hat and jumps in to appear next to the orb*

*there is a red and black orb flurrying with energy inside of casing*

Aiden: *touches it trying to be safe*

*an entire security system aims at him*

Aiden: *realises* never let them know your next move *goes to grab the orb but disappears with it*

Vi: what

Aiden: bet

Vi: huh?

Hat: L

Vi: what are you saying

Hat: you is a big L

Vi: *walks through the forcefield*

Aiden: sorry about him a dick-ed

Vi: -_-

Hat: suck a dick, suck it hard
Aiden: *kicks hat* sorry again

Vi; do I know what?

Aiden: do you have the orb?

Vi; Vice has it

Aiden: cool
Hat: *shoots a fake orb* take this

Vi: huh

Hat: I heard that orb Vice has is kinda worthless, last checked it would sell for £500, it may look good but that would be the same price of a PS5

Vi: this ain't Real

Hat: maybe there’s one in here *shoots out a replica of the orb Vice had*

*the orb doesn't have the same power as the original*

Vi: hmm

Hat: yea

Vi: you can give it back

He's back to normal

Lapis: ok, well thx for your help I will be going now *runs back to the facility like an inkling running*

Vi: ugh what a day

Aiden: ikr *unalives himself*

Vi: wha-

Hat: *does “It Krima” dance*

Vi: what...

Hat: end it

Vi: end what...?

(Shall we end it here)

*🏠*

Aiden: *comes out of hat* nice one little guy
Hat: no problemo man
Aiden: what, anyways pass out that dennimate
Hat: ah yes I get it *shoots out TNT*

*it gets knocked back by some sort of force*

*the tnt comes back to the hat
Aiden: WTF? *grabs the tnt and starts to poke the “force”*

*red forcefield*

Aiden: huh? *walks to it*

*forcefield noises*

Aiden: the shovel pls
Hat: ok *goes next to him and shoots out a shovel*

*shovel noises I guess*

(You guess? HE SHOT OUT THE F**KING THINGY)

Hat: *grabs the shovel and gives it to Aiden*

Aiden: thx lad *digs under just in
case*

Yeah probly

Story ended

Vice: how the hell can he hear me all the way over here

Hat: idk good hearing

Vice: huh...

Hat: L hearing

Vice; you're literally a hat bro you have nothing to brag about

Hat: *yapping moment*

(Wanna cut through here)

{yeah}

(Ok)
*cut through to Aiden*

Aiden: *goes to his house* let’s check that news *turns on tv to the news channel*

Breaking news: The vast orb of Bleak has been stolen out of the facility of wonder

Aiden: so that’s what the orb is? What does that do coincidentally?

Vi: *uses black and red energy to fly off*

Aiden: *angles the ladder to the red circles then hits all of them*

P-TELL: hello, I am Blobler known as P-TELL. Who would you want to summon?

Vi: summon anyone who's helpful!

Aiden: FOR ME!!!!!
P-TELL: alright help for Aiden *loads up help for Aiden*

*a text appears for it to be 1 minute*

Vi: *gets knocked back over to them*

Hat: …

Vi: agghh

P-TELL: I have this man for you Aiden, would you take him?

Aiden: indubitably I shall unless it can help only me

P-TELL: he’ll be transported to your place

Vi; ...

P-TELL: *summons Lapis*

Lapis: hey I’m supposedly in need of help from Aiden?

Aiden: that’s me!

Vi: can they help?

Lapis: for them, yes. So what’s going on?
Aiden: these f**kers took some kind of orb that could probably f**k us up. I saw it on the news.

Vi: yeah he got possessed right as he opened it

Lapis: where’s this f**k-ed
Hat: need…….. elp

Vi: some of my internal organs are gone

Lapis: alright *covers up Hat to hear him then covers up Vi to heal her* this will take a minute to heal up, as you can see with those green particles on you

Vi: okay...

*after a minute, the green particles faded away*

Lapis: there you’re all healed, now any more problems to help with?

Vi: him

Lapis: fwdym him?

Vice: you know you're not hurting me

You're hurting this innocent host

Vice it was?

Lapis: that’s what they all say, now I don’t want to be one of those characters from movies where they’re explaining about idk “your parents actually like you, you’re just over-exaggerating”

Hat: I bet Vice is lying
Aiden: well idk asked Vi
Hat: Hey Vi, can you tell me lore about your partner/brother/whatever the hell?

Vice; *creepily smiles*

Vi: We're not siblings! We just..work together

Aiden: yeah sure sure

Hat: ooooh I’m intrigued

Lapis: *eyes gleaming* what’s gotten you up there, you f**ked up the place *covers up healing ink in the city*

Vice: *blows up the city some more*

Lapis: *the healing ink comes back up* we can still keep it up

Hat: uh hello? I’m intrigued, TELL ME MORE VI!!!

Vice: buh

Vi: Yeah but he'd never attack me. It's not him who's doing that

Aiden: I saw that explosion yeah? That’s them

Hat: it was that orb Aiden

Aiden: yeah I know that but sti- wait what?

Hat: that orb yeah, the shit you were trying to get from them

Lapis: do you know a cure for this shitty ability he has?

Vi: didn't I tell you

Lapis: ah yes *kicking Vice hoping it gave him a concussion* BIG SMILE MATE, BIG WAVE THAT’S GREAT!

*there are a few explosions before they slow down and stop*

Lapis: has it been dealt with

Military soldier: I hope so

Lapis: *forms itself to its regular size* jelly bean is crazy

Military soldier: what...

Lapis: let’s check

Military soldier: right

Lapis: *checks*

*they're both laying in the rubble from where they crashed

Lapis: *removes the energy in him* there we go *picks up Vice*

Vice: GAH

Vi; -_-

Aiden: *punches Vice* you bitch *looks at Vi* no reaction, kinda cringe *pats Vi*

Vi: *punches him* don't touch me!

Vice: *runs off* toodaloo

Aiden: *shakes head* you think? *pulls out grappling hook and shoots it to their direction*

Vice; *cuts the rope with a red and black energy*

Aiden: I guess I have to travel wrong *brings out the magician hat*

INTERNET THAT FLIES! *jumps in to disappear*

Vi; wha-

Vice: Come on Vi!

*a hat with two legs running down mock speed*

Vice; what the f**k

Hat: LET’S RIIIIDE *picks up the speed faster*

*they stopped atop the roofs in front of a giant building*

Aiden: *a mile away*

Vice: remember the plan?

Vi: yeah yeah

Aiden: *thinks “not really”*